A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

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Why did little Jimmy go crying to his mummy? Because she was shot.

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u know whats a crime? rape

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Twelve men walk into a bar, and get stuck in the door because it's far too small for all of them to walk through at the same time.

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Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a car? I don't have a car in my garage.

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It was a beautiful day. Face.

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Q: Why are black people black? A: Cause they're from Africa.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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A guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for some water. The bartender replies: "Sorry, we don't have any." The man responds: "Sorry, I'm drunk." He walks out.

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What does a black guy get for Christmas? your bike.

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Why was the chipmunk watching TV? Because a new Family Guy was on.

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How do you find dennis ferguson? Look at danyons bckground

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Q: How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they are too weak to climb the ladder.

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Two latino men are drinking at a bar. Suddenly, one man falls off his barstool, unconscious. Later that day, he was diagnosed with pancreatitis, and died never having dealt with his severe alcoholism.

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A fat man walked into a hot dog.

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why did the little girl eat grapes? because she felt like it.

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If Tigger was a black panther Christopher Robin would have named him Nigger.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue Wait Arent Violets purple?

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Do you know why Justin Bieber is so successful? Because he is a talented dancer-singer who was lucky enough to be discovered by pop music icon Usher.

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A woman takes a shortcut through a dark alley. She is raped, robbed, and murdered. Her family mourns her death.

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A man goes to a petting zoo. He sees a zookeeper wrestling a bear. The bear kills the zookeeper and escapes from it's cage. It promptly mauls the rest of the staff and visitors at the zoo until it is shot by local police.

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poop.

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How many dead rats can you put in your ex-girlfriend's bed? 437.

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When ducks fly in a V formation do you know why one side is longer than the other? Because there are more ducks on that side.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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