What do a grape and an airplane have in common? They both have wings! except not the grape.

I baked a pie once. Guess what flavor it was. PIE FLAVOR!

So the question i got asked in order to post this was: Which one is easiest? and I thought to myself, the slutty one, obviously!!

one time, a fancy business man walked into a bar. but then he figured out that he wasnt supposed to be there. so he politely apologized to the mortician an and he granted him permission to exit the closet.

Trust me, you are that kind of girl, and no, you are not nerdy, you are open and down to ground, while your beautiful exterior means a lot to me (I am a man, its the way I am), I would never have wanted to talk to you or even less visit you with a pack (make it five packs) of condoms, if you where the awkward Asperger kind of gal, so how old are you, like seriously?

roses are gray, violets are gray, Im a dog

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

Why did the chicken cross the road? Although this is a highly improbable scenario, one would assume that, being a chicken, it did not have much of an intuitive idea as to what to do while it was stray for whatever reason in an urbanized area. Considering chickens do not harbor nearly as much of a mental capacity as it would require to even comprehend the concept of a "road" and is impervious to the idea of oncoming traffic and such, the fact that it happened to be crossing the road was in fact not even recognized by the chicken. For this reasons I deem this question unanswerable.

Why do dyslexic people stink at typing? c k j a h s d i u p q h g n z v m n k b e r t y o f This is why...

why did the man die? Because he was robbing a bank and police used lethal weapons By- the duck

What's long and hard and full of semen? An erect penis at the climax of an orgasm.

Have you heard about the Polish princess? There isn't one. The Polish monarchy was abolished in 1918.

Why are all black people fast? They aren't its a stereotype.

Knock Knock Knockin on heavens door..

How do you know you're on a blind date with a black person? If they agree to eat at KFC in Compton (Wyndellberg)

What did the elephant say to the naked man? "Cute, cute, but can it pick up peanuts?"

Do you know whats funny? No do you know i was asking a question

why did the blind kid cross the road... because he was sick of being blind

Yo mama's so ugly, she has difficulty attracting a partner.

Q: Why wasn't the baby playing with his blocks? A: Because his face was stapled to the floor

What's worse than getting a apple and finding a worm in it. Getting hit in the face with a meteorite.

Your momma's so not fat that when a school bus rolled by here house, she just sat there and turned on oprah.

What's the difference between Chuck Norris and Bigfoot? Nothing. Their both really hairy.

that green thing is not a leaf, it's my sister

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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