How do you get your dog to stop peeing on the floor? SHOOT IT!!!

Your mom is so stupid that she was unable to make it into the college of her choice.

what is the difference between a white woman and a black woman.. i raped the black one

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all stuck on a desert island together. They eventually succumb to dehydration and heat exhaustion. They lasted five days.

American: Nice cowboy hat Australian: hahahahahaha American: What's so funny? Australian: You're so incompetent... American: What does incompetent mean? Australian: http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/7/78/Trollface.svg/200px-Trollface.svg.png

A twelve year old play Minecraft. He never made any friends. What did you expect?

there's a blonde and a brunette jumping out of a plane, what one hits the ground first? they both hit at the same time because gravity pulls everything down towards the earth at the same pace

What's red, white and blue? You're mother on her period after she had sex. I don't know where the blue came from.

What's slow and spotted? A cheetah, I lied about the slow part

theres a mexican, an asian, and an american in a plane, they're about to crash, so they all have to throw out something they have a lot of in their country. The Mexican throws out beans, and says "I have to many of these in my country." The Asian throws out rice and says "i have to many of these in my country." The American throws out the Mexican and says "I have to many of these in my country."

Whats funnier then a dead baby a dead baby dressed as a clown

joke

There once was a man from Nantucket Who got his head stuck in a bucket He yanked and he yowled, he hollered and howled, Then gave up and grumbled, "Aw, I guess I'll have to go to the doctor."

what did the teacher say to his student? do your work.

What did the man say to the other man. Hi

alex is cool

A black guy, a white guy, and a mexican are on a boat, stranded in the middle of the ocean. Feeling a bit hot due to the above average temperature of an early april afternoon, the white guy and the mexican strip down to enjoy a refreshing dip in the water a few feet from the boat. The black guy, feeling a bit left-out and perhaps even envious at the apparent fun of the other two, speaks up "Hey fellas, do you think one of you could come sit in the boat so it doesn't float away so that maybe I can enjoy the water too?" Hearing this, the white guy and the mexican look at each other utterly astonished. Grasping for a rebuttal, the white guy gathers some courage and says "Do you really think that's a good idea?... You JUST finished your sandwich."

person 1: Do you have a christmas necklace I could borrow for a party? person 2: I have a one with a leprechaun.

Q: Why did the clown fall off the swing? A: Because he was shot in the face

Write Your Own Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side Enter the following: Which is bigger the moon or the elephant? Your Answer: The elephant [] I have read and agree to the Terms of Service ((((Submit)))) [1 error prohibited this post from being saved] ---There were problems with the following field -> Wrong answer

why did the girl fall off the swing? because someone threw a fridge at her.

Two Jews walk into a pub. They don't order a ham sandwich.

Why couldn't the child go to the park? He was a registered sex offender.

What did the sun say to the moon ?? Nothing - they can't speak

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...