Your mumma is so fat that she wears large clothes.

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why did every one care when i killed my self they didn't

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Why did the pilot crash the plane? Because it wasn't a pilot it was a toaster.

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I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

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/\ The joke above was really dumb. \/ The joke below is pretty good.

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How do you make your mom mad? Burn down the house and eat the dog.

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Why didn't the priest move in with the two rabbi? Because having three adults between the ages of 18 and 65 occupying the dwelling would have violated their insurance policy.

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Little Timmy enjoyed school He went to Sandy Hooks

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What do you get when you cross a Pigeon with a Mailbox? A Carrier Pigeon, they are extinct now.

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Knock knock. who's there? your dead cat, here you go.

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why did the chicken cross the road i hate it when people ask questions they already know the answer to

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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The Americans have just spent millions of dollars working on a pen that works in space. I would of just used a pencil.

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I am dyslexic

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Mr. Wonder, optimism is seeing the glass as half full, pessimism as seeing the glass half empty, and realism as not seeing the glass at all.

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Why did the husband and wifes marriage fail? The husband slept with many other women and is putting his family through a hellacious situation.

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Why Johnny's parents threw out his broken bike? - ´Cause Johnny got hitted by a drunken driver and died last week, when he was cycling to school.

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What's funnier than cancer? Just about anything. There's nothing funny about terminal illnesses.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who are we kidding, when have you ever seen a chicken crossing a road?

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Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a car? I don't have a car in my garage.

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How many women does it take to ski across the pit of lava? None, they would burn and die.

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whats funny about this joke? nothing.

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What happened when the man turned on his TV? It was tuned to the Discovery Channel

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if chuck norris had 5 dollars and you had 10 dollars you would have 5 dollars more than Chuck Norris

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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