Why didn't my marriage work out? Because I married a tangerine.

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How do you confuse a blonde? To get to the other side

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How can you make sure your friend wont die of cancer? Decapitate him

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-funny? women have rights -funnier? civil rights

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You know those people that learned the true name of God, as God asked kindly... ...Well you know God can be nice sometimes but he actually COMMANDED they keep his name secret forever? They became the first people known as Jehova`s witnesses... JEHOVAH<<< SECRET NAME ANYBODY? So much for keeping his secret name guys! They claim that only a few thousand humans will ascend to heaven, in other words all of the JEHOVA`s witnesses... All two billions of them or something... For keeping his name (Cough JEHOVAH) secret. SUCCESS!

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How many sheets did the Asian want on his bed? "You sheet on my bed I kill you!"

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What's brown and white all over? Chad butthole

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Why did a black man enter a KFC? Because he had been in town a while and had grown hungry over the period of walking around, and decided he should get some food to satisfy his hunger so he may continue his journey around town. The fact he entered KFC is purely coincidental, as he could've easily decided to go to a different eatery, but it just so happens that the closest one was a KFC.

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Where does the Queen of England live? England.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause Magic Johnson has AIDS

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What do you call a magic owl? HOO-DINI!

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Why did the black 10 year old miss school? Because his grandmother just had a severe heart attack and the whole family is coming in to visit and pay their last respects.

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roses are red violets are blue some poems rhyme others don't.

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"Why did the clown fall off the swing" "he was shot in the face"

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Yo momma so fat, when she turns around, people give her a welcome back party!

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roses are red violets are blue i have dementia its not funny

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What do you get with you crossbreed a lamp with a chicken? Nothing... You can't crossbreed an inanimate object with a living being.

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- Why the black people smell? - To let even the blind person hate them.

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What's worse than getting full-blown AIDS? Finding a half-eaten worm in your apple.

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I went to a restaurant, but after I ate the food felt sick, then I remembered that I ordered penis with cum Popsicles so I knew it couldn't be the food

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If Timmy has 2 apples and Sarah has 7 apples, what is the square root of the distance of Mars and Jupiter divided by the speed of light if X equals the value of negative infinity given the equation X(2) - E=MC/7?

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What happened to the blonde who blew out her birthday candles? Her hair caught on fire

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Why did Suzie fall out of her swing? Because she had no arms.

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Q: A black man, A Mexican, And a Asian are in a car. Who Is Driving? A: The Cop.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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