What did the farmer say when the potatoes were ready for harvest? The potatoes are ready for harvest.

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How did the man die? He was killed alive.

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what did the unicorn say to the centaur? nothing because neither exist

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A man and a bird are on the edge of a cliff. The man falls off and dies and the bird flies away because birds can fly and people can't.

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Why did the man look in the mirror? To see his reflection.

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When is a door not a door? When your house burns down.

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Timmy needed to use the restroom in class, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I go use the restroom?". The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said, "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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What is the difference between an anti-joke and a joke? The word anti before anti-joke.

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I Have A Dog Named Woof Woof A Chicken Called Clucky A Cow Named Moo And A Pig Named Oink Lol Jks I Was Talking About My Wife

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Why was 6 afraid of seven? seven commited statitory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8, murdered nine, was sent to jail for life, let out early for community service, and told 6 he was coming forhim 6 months later.... 6 commited suicide by jumping off a cliff his body was never found his family didnt get to say good bye thats why 6 is afraid of 7

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Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He died

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What did the rug say to the floor? I got you covered

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair, and died of cancer

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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Friends are like balloons When you stab them they die.

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There is a blond and a burnette in a car. The blonde is driving. What a nice use of the carpool

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A duck walks into a bar *************************** Later that day the homeless man had duck for dinner.

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Words with two W's or N's in them are awkward and unnecessary.

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A bra walks into a dyslexic man.

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If the human population held hands around around the equator A significant portion of them would drown.

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What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Jews are human beings. Pizza is a type of food.

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A manly man drives up in a yellow bug, What do the girls think? They think its very manly! (;

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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