Why can't Hellen Keller play the piano? She's dead.

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What do you get when you stab a man in the leg with a knife? A court summons because you have committed a horrible crime

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What did the boy say when he got hit by a car? Nothing, he punctured his lungs.

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Why did the man fall off his bike? Because he wasn't on a bike.

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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why was the black guy that was smoking weed in his car not sent to jail? when the cop pulled him over he thought he was black the way he was dancing but turned out to be white but that just looked black when hes dancing.

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How do you piss off a moose? You throw popcorn at it

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No Neither has Stevie

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my egg roll

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What's the best thing about the Pixies? Their music.

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Q: What did bulbasoar say to charmander? A: Bet ya thought I was gunna say Bulbasoar!!

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How did the man lose his arm? beacuse of the five year old with a knife obsesion standing right beind you at this minute...

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What did the little girl buy for her cat? A box to bury him in.

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This statement is false.

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how do you keep a monkey from stealing your banana? shoot it

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Q: whats the difference between 3 asain people 3 black people and 3 mexican prople?? A: there all different nationality

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What is the difference between a white man and black man who are facing each other? They have different rights.

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Two peanuts walked into a bar... One was a salted.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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how does a chinese chick check if she's pregnant? swallows a rubix cube and if it comes out solved shes pregnant

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why was the 6 year old boy crying? his mother had just passed away from terminal cancer and his stepdad caught him crying so he kicke hm in the face and told him to man up.

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What's worse then 10 dead babies in 1 tree? 1 dead baby in 10 trees...

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What did Billy get his dad for Father's day? Nothing, his dad was killed by a spinning helicopter blade when Billy was 3.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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