Why did the Egyptian woman not manage to work the washing machine? The instructions were in English.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was shot In the face. Why did the cow fall out of the tree it was stapled to the monkey.

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What are jews without the holocaust? Alive

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Q: what do u call a plane that flies A: a plane

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Whats bent but straight for danielle? Joseph Plummer

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im not black, im Joseph Kony

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why was the little boy crying? he wasnt, he died 2 weeks ago

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What's red, white and not blue. A Canadian flag

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Where do you go when you find a fork in the road? To the nearest restaurant.

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What's worse than getting arrested? getting arrested on your birthday.

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A: my name is Joe and i like onion B: ok

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How do you know that an elephant has been in your refrigerator? The door is ripped off and the refrigerator is lying on it's side. All the shelves are strewn around the floor and your food has been partially eaten or simply crushed. You also have costly damage done to your house and most likely a frightened elephant in your house

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Why did Sarah fall off the swings? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Sarah

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Did you hear about the dyslexic atheist? He didn't believe in santa.

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What happens when your dog is bad? A crying dog who has to sleep in the BACKYARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Stupid dog....

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.It got ran over by a bus.

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A young black girl walks in to a bar. Because she was not of the legal age to consume alcoholic beverages she was asked to leave in a peaceful manner.

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Your mum's so fat, she attends regular weight loss facilities to lose weight.

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Why did the Bruins win against the Flyers? ....they had goal tending.

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Q. What do you get when you cross a man, a bear and a pig? A. ManBearPig

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Why are you so stupid? Becuse I spelled because wrong

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The Lord told Moses to come forth. He tripped and came fifth.

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Why didn't the condemned man seek a reprieve of his execution? He forgot.

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What did the Asian dad say to his son when he got an A- in math? Good job son.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops