What did the poor family eat for thanksgiving? Food

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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What's the difference between Elisabeth Fritzl and Pope John Paul II? Pope John Paul II wasn't imprisoned and raped continuously over a 24 year period in a horrific act of cruelty by his father

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Knock Knock Who's there? Sally. I don't know anyone by that name, please go away.

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Why could'nt Susie talk? The mafia cut out her tounge

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How many seeds does a watermelon have? None. It is seedless.

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yo mama is so ugly she walked by a mirror and looked at her reflection cuz thats what mirrors do

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How do you confuse a blonde? take the albuterol

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What do you call a bird that can't fly? A dead bird

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who is there? Not Suzie

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Why did the stoner cross the road? He didn't. He was stoned

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Why did the man throw a clock? In retaliation for his wife having thrown a vase at him. The couple has a history of domestic violence. More than one friend has suggested counselling.

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Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar.... Homosexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual pandas just have piece? Man 1: Were the hell did you come from? Homosexual Panda: My mother's uterus same as you, retard.

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That awkward momment when there is no Candy in the Van... <3

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what has genitial warts? me

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What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? Everything.

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Sorry babe, even if I was I would not tell you, the entire place is surrounded, but within enough of a distance, so we will plant a nice setup around the green shack so everyone assumes his deal was some solo operation, if someone else is heading at his direction now, you are gonna get busted, so you better stay down.

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what do you call a cat that looks like a lion 7

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https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCM8MQg1bn9y38H8Irhuxx-g

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? A very unfortunate blind fish.

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Who are the faster readers? New Yorkers, they through 110 stories in 5 seconds

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Why did Chuck Norris's calendar go from March 31st to April 2nd? There was a misprint

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What do you call a Muslim in control of a plane? A pilot

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What shall we do with the drunken sailor? Call the police to have him escorted off the boat for operating a large veichle under the influence of alcohol.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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