Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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Do you know what kind of world I dream of? Until you tell me, no I don't. How could I? I'm not telepathic, after all.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To pick up the carcass of its road-killed younger brother and weep.

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Why did the girl scream? She was being raped.

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve you kind here." The black man says, "Is it because I'm black?" The bartender replies, "Yes."

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What's the richest fish in the sea? The one you threw a quarter at.

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How many plumbers does it take to unscrew a lightbulb? Plumbers don't do that. Electricians do.

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What do you call an attractive woman in a blender? A very rare occurrence.

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What did the black guy say to the Jewish guy when it began to rain? It's raining.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not good at rhyming turd

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it's easy to take part, just type your text below!

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The asian boy only did an hour of study....... nothing was heard of him after his mum found out

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What's the best thing about the Pixies? Their music.

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How do you kill a mime? Shoot him in the face.

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Did you hear the one about the bus driver? Me neither

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knock knock who's there Bob I don't know you Bob and if you don't get off my porch this minute i'm calling the authorities.

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What's worse than a crying baby on a trans-Atlantic flight? A hungry lion on a trans-Atlantic flight.

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What's green and blue, and red all over? Nothing. It if were red all over it wouldn't be green and blue.

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What did the 80 year old man do to celebrate valentines day with his wife? Nothing, Alzheimer's made him forget about Valentines day.....and that he was married. What did his wife do for Valentines day? Killed herself.

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jordan godfrey is good looking lolololol

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knock knock! who's there? me.(walks away...)

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What did Steve Hagen say to Steve Walters? "We have the same first name."

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Woman:I give my Heart to You! Man:Thank You!!! The Woman then dies because one can't live without a heart

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A dog got into a gingerbread house. She ate some and brought some to the basement it got on the couch!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops