What is a 6.9? A period getting in the way of a good time!

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A man walks into a bar and poops his pants. He left because of the embarrassment.

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Whats is worse than a dog bite? A shark bite. Whats worse than a shark bite? The Holocaust.

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What do you call an African American on the moon? An astronaut

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Your mother is so fat, she tried to suicide because she was unhappy with her weight. She tried a diet and it didn't work; she suffers from depression and went to see a doctor about her weight. Life is getting worse for your mother and she is starting to develop diabetes. Your relatives and cousins are going to the hospital to visit her sometime this week; the doctor says she only has about a week left before she passes away.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because seven threatened to murder his family

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because this chicken had a mental disability and saw on the news that there was a hospital on the other side of the road that could treat his illness and possibly save his life, allowing him to fulfill his life-long dream of retirement. But knowing that chickens do not possess the brain power capable of understanding the situation that this chicken was in, it had probably gotten lost and just wandered off.

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Why can't Abraham Lincoln tell a lie? Because he's dead.

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why did the black man get kicked out of the hospital? nothing was wrong with him.

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A father and son get into a car crash. They go to the hospital and both the father and son are unconsciuos. The doctor comes in to the son's room and says, "I can't operate on this boy, he is my son. How could this happen if the dad is knocked out? It was a gay couple.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A. Treadmil

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? The answer is not definitive and involves several factors including the size of the woodchuck, the woodchuck's teeth, the climate in which that woodchuck lives, and the tenacity of that particular woodchuck at achieving his goal.

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knock knock who's there a tiger Alex proceeds to walk away as there is a tiger at his front door. he then calls the police because of the potential danger. the animal control then apprehends the animal and takes it to an enclosure

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Why did the heroin addict get staff infection? His skin broke open multiple times without proper cleansing.

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What did the alcoholic say to the blind man? Nothing. But he beat his wife and kids savagely.

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Why was the kid running around? He was on fire

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Lindsay Lohan

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A sloth walked into the dentists he was confused

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What do you call a man hit by a bus? Dead

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what did the maker of anti jokes website say while reading some of the jokes on here? these people r idiots. and he lived happily ever after. then died. Good one

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Little Billy rested his head on the pile of bricks. It had been a hard day for Little Billy, but, in less than an hour, he would finally see his worm again.

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This is not a joke.... It is mind rape.

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A man gets pushed in to a pole...

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Why was the couple in the waiting room crying? Because their son was diagnosed of AIDS and will probably not live into his twenties.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops