Roses are red, Violets are blue, That's okay, I'm not colourblind.

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An orange walks into a bar....orange you glad I didn't say banana?!?!

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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What's it called when One Direction wins a Grammy Award? It's never going to happen; so why give it a name?

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Why did the prince kiss his beloved just before going into battle? Intermission.

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boobs!

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Why were the Jews stuck in Germany? Because Joseph Rosenstein and his Jewish family missed their train out of Frankfurt to go to Paris, and so they had to stay another night in their hotel.

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Why did Jimmy not go to school? Because Jimmy, along with his family, were killed in a horrible house fire. Knock Knock? Who's there? Not Jimmy...

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Why did the girl start crying? Her pet sunflower had just died.

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A guy thought it could be funny to write a joke that is not and post it on a social network. And did it

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Yo mama so fat she has to wear large clothes

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Two friends are arguing over who is the best pie maker. '' I've made pumpkin, apple, peach, cherry, blueberry, and sweet potato!" " Yeah well I've made all of those AND pecan!'' ''Yeah well have you ever made boysenberry pie?!" "No! What the hell!" *in a calm tone* " Yeah, me neither."

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Why did the cow cross the road? -Because it lives in India and is allowed to.

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Q. why did the plane crash? A. because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Why did the man cross the street? Because no cars were coming and he wanted to get to the othher side

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What happened to Johnny when he tripped over his shoelace? He was shot by the man who was following him.

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whats the diffrents beetween a footballer and a hat nothing i lke chesse

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What's funnier then the holocaust? A second one.

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that moment when the last few ceral are like "Come on catch me bitch"

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"bus driver pressed the horn at my mum and she stuck a finger up at him " Not the first time she's got the horn and shoved a finger up

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What do you call two black people on one bike? Unsafe. Regular bicycles are typically not suited for use by two people at once, black or otherwise. Riding on the handlebars is dangerous and can lead to serious injury.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple ? Joseph Fritzl.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road ? A. Because he had grown tired of living thus choosing to end his life.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops