What do you say to a jew with blood on his leg? Are you okay?

There are two fish in a tank and one says to the other, "how do we drive this thing?"

How do you make a professional gamer cry? You burn his house down.

scenario: retarded monkey upside down in a mirror question: why is jims dad fat answer: the mexican chicken is an aperadus

What's worse than watching 5 homeless men have an orgy? Waking up and having to clean the sheets

i tell you whats funny......... what? a fat sudanese man

Once there was a frog. My parents died.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have ADD Hey look, a squirrel!!

A black man walks into a bar and he orders a margarita. The bartender says that the margaritas are exceptionally delicious in this bar. He was right.

Friend's sister: how many seconds are in 12 o'clock Friend: alot Friend's sister: WELL THEN 12 O'CLOCK IS A REWERJAJSBDKDJDHRJRJFHFKRJRIDBDKSBSDJ *slams door*

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding poo in your shoe.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? because she's a woman

what is green and smells bad? an orange dolphin that poops out rainbows.

Anne Widdecombe becomes attractive.

Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken is subject to speculation.

two hippo's were in the lake. The water was up to their eyes. What did one hippo say to the other? I don't know why but i keep thinking it's tuesday.

A drunk guy walks out of an AA meeting.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT IS.

time to spruce up!

What has legs but can't walk? A table...or a dog with four broken legs.

why is 6 afraid of 7? haha! because 7 ate 9 no because 7 is black

If pro is the oppisite of con what is the oppiste of progress Congress

Why did the man fall on the floor? He had a heart attack.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it is an animal without a high enough level of intelligence to see the dangers in doing so.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...