What's tall, has a really long neck, and eats leaves? My tall vegan neighbor's giraffe

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken. How do you get a baby to run faster? Chase it with the lawn mower. What do you get when you cut a baby with a straight razor? An erection. What do you get when you put a dead baby in a blender? Hold on. I'll tell you in a second. What's pink and spits? A baby in a frying pan. -S

Roses are red, pink, white or yellow. Stop stereotyping my arrogant fellow.

rofl lol, the joke below me has made my computer offer to translate this page. It thinks it's in Spanish

Why the West African Rhino is extinct? They were never Horny

what do you call a black man in a police car? either officer or offender, depending on what role he has in the crime.

Knock-Knock Who's there? A giant spider-like insect that lays eggs in your brain which turn into larvae that drop down onto your tongue and eat your teeth slowly, then form a cocoon and turn into the spider-like insect spoken of previously. You then wake up from this terrible nightmare and get ready for your well paying job.

When was George Washington born? Who the hell knows. He's older than dirt.

Ambition is like a frog sitting on a Venus Flytrap. The flytrap can bite and bite, but it won't bother the frog because it only has little tiny plant teeth. But some other stuff could happen and it could be like ambition.

Steven Hawking walks into a bar. Steven Hawking is disabled from the neck down. I lied.

Girl:Do you wanna hear a joke? Boy:Sure... Girl: jesus loves you

roses are red violets are blue pornhub is down ya mums facebook will do

Why was a woman not considered in the role for a stunt driver? Because her skill level was not sufficient enough for the requirements.

An Irishman walked into a bar, except he would call it a pub, because there are slight differences in vocabulary in different regions, 37 minutes later he walked home safely, fed his cat, read some pages of a book he had been reading, turned the light off and went to bed.

What is human, went bankrupt eight times, got a small loan of a million dollars, and is over all a terrible person? Your probably thinking Donald Trump Well your correct.

What does a black man do in the bathroom? He Dookies on bobby

"...."-Hellen Keller

Why did Sarah fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah.

There were 3 women, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. They were driving with a gorilla when suddenly the car crashed. All the women died but only the gorilla survived. The police investigated with the gorilla and did some simple sign language. The police, using hand motions, asked the gorilla what each individual female was doing before the car crashed. The gorilla ran away for reasons unknown.

Once upon a time there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly, everyone died. The end.

If 1+1=2, then you must have passed first grade arithmetic.

Q: Why did the girl have dirty knees? A: Cause she was dragged through the forest and raped.

whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? finding two worms in your apple

what do you call aca that got pushed in a pool ? A WET PUSSY

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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