Q: What's worse than not having a good relationship? A: Starving Africans

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blargen fa-diddle nachen!

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Knock Knock The door's open, wipe your shoes off on the matt

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread

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What do you call a magic MAAAAAAAAAAAN? A magic man

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Where did Jonathan go when the bombs hit? Everywhere.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

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why did the chicken cross the road? who cares its a chicken.

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What did the Fish say to the other Fish? Nothing, fish cant talk.

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what would george washington do if he was alive today? he would scream and scratch his coffiin

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Q: What cat walks on two feet? A: Garfield Q: What mouse walks on two feet? A: Mickey Mouse Q: What duck walks on two feet? A: Donald Duck? A: No, all ducks you dipshit.

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Yo momma's so skinny she doesn't have any fat!

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What's black, white, and red all over? A pile of dead nuns.

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What starts with an 's' and ends with a 'hit'? Shortly after the war, 4 men went to celebrate at the local bar. They all had a grand time there, when a man in black walked into the bar. The man in black knocks once on the bar. "What do you want?" asked the bartender. The man in black didn't respond. This time, the bartender asked again, only louder. The man in black then turned to his right to face the 4 other men celebrating. The man in black then suddenly pulled out a pistol, and shot the 4th man. He then burst into a sprint and ran out of the bar. "He's hit," the 3rd man shouted, "he's hit!"

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Knock knock whos there? I have no anus

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What's worse than getting a paper cut? Getting shot in the face.

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A. What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew: B. Pizza's don't scream when you put them into a oven.

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Suzy.

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Why did the chicken cross the road Time for you to get a watch

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What is a dogs favorite color? Gray due to the fact that they cant see any other color

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Why was the strict Asian father angry when his son got an A- on his test? He found out that his son had been cheating.

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how did the kenyan get away from the cup He didnt he got arrested

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a baby in your closet.

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How did the retarded, blind child win the Special Olympics? He didn't, he died of terminal lung cancer the year before. R.I.P.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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