A man and woman walk into a funeral home. They are both very sad about the loss of their father who they loved dearly.

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Q: What did the priest say to the small child. A: Rite?

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A giraffe walks into a bar and the bar tender asks "Why the long face?!" to witch he replied " I've just been mugged outside.".

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Q: Whats the longest book in the library A: Understanding Women

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just a man and his thoughts....and a smart phone app, and a loving family, thats not the point.

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why do they sparkle?!?!?!?!

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whats funnier than anti jokes nothing

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what has two feet and is black all over? your mom after she died in a horrific house fire.

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what's a fish with no eyes and out of water? its just a fish

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An Irish man walks past a bar... it could happen...

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Why was the number 6 afraid of 7? It wasn't.

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What did Dmitri say to all his friends? Nothing he has no friends

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Q: What's big, green, fuzzy, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A: A pool table.

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what's the difference between dodo and doodoo doodoo is still around for you to see

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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what happens when Pinocchio says "My nose is growing"?

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What's cute and smokes? A cute person with a nicotine addiction.

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Women's rights...

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Why is the average lifespan of Black men in the U.S. only about 52? Hundreds of years of oppression and a lack of nutritional, liberal, and vocational education have put them in a position where gathering the resources necessary to live a healthy and safe life are greatly is incredibly difficult.

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Why couldn't the convicted felonist get back to America? He was in Antarctica and accidentally licked a flagpole.

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What's worse than a baby in a blender? Two babies in a blender

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because I hit her with an axe.

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A guy finds a lamp in the desert and rubs it 3 times.. No genie appears because there is no such thing as Magic.

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Q: What is the scariest thing ever? A: Child Birth.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops