Why did the turtle fall out of the car? It forgot to buckle up

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the penguin say to the other penguin? Nothing, penguins don't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do people from Indian Hill laugh? Like an Indian, huh, huh, huh!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

what do call a purple animal that eats rocks? A purple rock eater..

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What is a poop on a poopstick? A pile of poop.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

You know what a thief's kid receive on christmas? Your bike!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

what did the bull say when it got shot? nothing... its a bull

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What is black and white, and red all over? A mutilated penguin.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the student get expelled from a Christian school? He continually beat other students between class periods.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Chuck Norris can get a nuke in Black Ops.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A man walks into a bar and sees two girls making out. He orders a drink and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q. What goes "ninety-nine CLUMP, ninety-nine CLUMP, ninety-nine CLUMP"? A. Nothing does.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why do white people not eat crackers? Cause it's cannabalism.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Your mom is so poor she can't afford to buy herself nice things.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Lol, she does not think anything, she knows. Its not unfaithfulness if you ask for permission and are granted so because the trust is strong and mutual.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Your face

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the woman fall off her bike? She got hit by a car door

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms! Knock knock! Who'z there? Not Suzy.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A friend? Just a friend that you told to stop pretending to be me? And you had no idea whatsoever that I am Nero as in not one of the six hundred thousand wabbabes?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the wife get her husband after they had intercourse? A sandwich, because she loved him and knew he was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

i walk into a bar,and then proceed to be taken out because i am a minor -chuckles

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A man goes into the doctors office for his yearly checkup. The man waits patiently for several minutes until the doctor is ready to see him. After about ten minutes pass, the doctor is ready to see him. The man enters the doctors office. He passes all of the necessary tests. The doctor and him talk for a while. After a few minutes, the doctor says, "Okay, thanks for coming. See you next year." The man thanks the doctor and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

why do black people like lotion? because everybody else does.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops