I don't know which one is emptier my bank account or my love life

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What did Heinrich Himmler say to the chicken? I'll take that liver thanks.

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How does it change many dyslexics to take a lightbulb.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Rocky was chasing him

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What did the POW say to his captor? I do not want to be waterboarded.

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your social life.

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Q:What does a wheel a triangle and a circle all have in common A:There all round, I lied about the triangle.

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If an ugly person got raped. What would that be called? Nothing. It is never gonna happen. Kelvin Yang.

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what do you give a little girl with no legs and no arms for christmas...................cancer

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ilglsdfbvklwbkvbsjklgvsdgbvilsdbklvbwdjkbvwdfseghrfvuowebg

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knock knock. who's there? me. me who? shut up im robbing you.

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What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

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I flipped through the Yellow Pages, made a few calls, and found the Chinese man I was looking for.

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What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it does whatever the hell it wants to do!

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How do u keep annoying children off your front lawn? Molest Them.

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Why is Skrillex so bad a fishing? He has Parkinson's Disease

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Hey do you have a suitcase? Why? I need one.

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knock knock who's there? doorbell repairman

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What's the difference between a duck? One leg is both the same

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What did one elephant say to the other elephant? Nothing. Elephants don't talk.

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knock knock who's there bob bob who bob marley who else

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand and says to the man running the stand. QUACK!!!

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him what he wants to drink. He orders a beer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops