Hello, I'm Mark and I have multiple-personality disorder. Don't listen to him, no he doesn't.

Dude, you're playing call of duty by yourself and in last place...HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE!!??

I was very thirsty so I decided to go get some soda.Upon reaching the soda store I discovered a very long line. I decided to leave the line and instead get some milk, unfortunately once again there was a long line at the milk store. Discouraged by still thirsty I decided to try to luck at the punch store. There was a long line there also.

What happens when you put Michael Jackson in a room full of little boys? The 3 year-old rotting corpse of Michael Jackson and a room full of traumatized little boys.

How can you tell if someone's a Vegan? It will probably come up in conversation, usually during the planning phase of a trip to a restaurant.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a serial rapist.

Why Lilly fell out of a cradle ? She had no arms.

Why did Sara fall off the swing? She had no arms.

what is worse than a joke? an anti-joke.

Women can vote? wtf

why did the chicken cross the road? because he frickin wanted to!!!!!!

A man walks into a bar. The barman says, 'why the lo-, wait, i thought you was that horse again.'

Whats the difference between anne frank and osama bin laden? Nothing. They were both found eventually.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are rather unintelligent animals which clearly underestimate the dangers of crossing a busy road.

J?????????????????o??????????????????????k?????????????????????????e?????????????????????????????????????s??????????????????? ??????????????????????????????????????o??????????????????????n??????????????????? ??????????????????????????????????????y???????????????????????????????????o????????????????????????????????u????????????????????????????????.?????????????????????????????.????????????????????.????????????????????????

Why are cats mammals? Because they are descended from primordial mammals in the distant past which are the common ancestors of all mammals.

“Knock knock” “Who's there?” “Jesus” “Jesu.............wait, REALY?” “No,Jesus is currently "dead".”

What does a cow do at McDonald's? He is eaten by obese people.

Q.Whats the differents between justin bieber and a girl A.Nothing

42

Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

#IsaiahAfterAD&B

What did the foreigners do to pass time? They blew up the twin towers.

If you are riding on a boat and all the wheels fall off, how many pancakes would it take to make a dog house? It does not matter because fish don't like tomatoes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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