A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. His family is struggling financially and his children are severely malnourished. If he wasn't an alcoholic, he could afford healthcare for his family and move into a better neighborhood. But he's not, so they will die a long, painful death.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Malcom: Knock Knock. Jessica: Who's there? Malcom: It's Malcom. Jessica: Okay. Come in.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

You wanna know what's out of this world? The moon.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What you do if you poo out a slug? Eat it.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

a dedicated fat guy joins a kung fu dojo he is asked to dedicate his like to his kung fu the fat man dose not he is already dedicated to being a fat guy

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Jeff has 45 candy bars. He eats 40. What does Jeff have? Diabeetus

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Vagina jokes aren't funny, period.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

what did the homeless man say to the stranger? nothing, he let he let his gun do the talking

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Hey, do you want to play the rape game ? NO! That's the spirit

thumb_up thumb_down -25

roses are red violets are blue i have to poop

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What does the color 9 smell like? Purple, because aliens don't wear hats

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why is Kony so mean? He used to date your mom.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do you call a woman that is on her period? -A girl that is expirencing a difficult to control flow of blood through the clitorus.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

ask me if i have a place to call home> 'have you a place to call home?' no im sad and lonely.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Two arabs fly into a bar in the twin towers

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Q. Why didn't the Atheist enter the church? A. Because Atheists do not go to church so he had no reason to enter.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did the man order at KFC, in Miami? A face.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did Mel Gibson say to his wife? I apologise for my rude behaviour and intolorable cursing.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Your d is so small that when you had a boner and walked into the wall....... YOU BROKE YOUR NOSE! Millimeter Monster bro

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Tommy got neutered.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Bill Walters from across the street. How are we talking through a door?

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What you do you call a gay man with no arms and legs? His name.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

where did juan go after getting hit by a bus? the ground

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What dinosaur makes honey? The Bee Rex.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops