wanna here a good joke? me too.

How can you tell two twin sisters apart? Look at one twin, then look at the other, and acknowledge that they are two different people.

What did the woman say when she ate crabs. This smells like my vagina (This women died slowly from crabs)

why can't the bat see? Because it's made of metal

A black man "walks into" a club. Several minutes later he is dead. The police, in a later press conference, refuse to admit that the club ever left the officer's belt.

Wanker

Why did susie fall off the swing? Because an arrow penetrated her head.

What did the cow say to the chicken crossing the road? Moo

Barney is a pedophile Loves dino molestation Stuck a dildo in his ass And died of constipation

What kind of bee's make milk? Booobies!

Person 1: Happy Halloween! Person 2: Hey, I'm Jewish

A Muslim walks into a bar No-one survives the blast

what did the tree say when it fell down? Nothing it is humanly impossible for a tree to talk. Especially after it fell down. I mean that would hurt.

What's the hardest part about blending a baby? My dick

Jeff comes home from a long day at work. As a result he is very tired. So, he decides to go to bed.

How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? About 144 licks but everyone gets different answers because we all lick lollipops differently.

What is the difference between a car accident and being on your period? A period is less bloody.

69!!! (its funny cause i made a referance to 69)

One day in school two kids had a conversation. Susan: What do you want to do when your older? Oliver: I want to go to the moon. Susan: Oh. I went there last week. Oliver: Can you smell something. Susan: Haven't you ever been to Pennsylvania.

Your momma is so old, it is likely that she will pass away in the near future, and I would recommend you to spend some quality time with her.

we asked cheryl cole what she would do if it was the last day on earth she replied.. id probably spend all the time with my family. wrong cheryl youd spend your last day on earth running away from other people wanting to accomplish their last day on earth dreams

Why was the Mexican man in the rich man's garden? Because he enjoys flowers.

three people come to a serial killers house. one was annoying one was immature and one was stupid he would put them all in the same boat. then he towed it into shark infested waters, sunk it and watched them speak their mind. the annoying one said "nah nah nuh boo boo you cant eat me!" the immature one said "im gonna ride one!" and the stupid one said "could you please tell your sharks to stop eating my leg? i need it to swim away from these sharks that are eating my leg." moral of the story: dont go to serial killers homes. they will most likely kill you.

Why did the chicken cross the road---- because he's having financial and relationship related problems that make his life so hideously unbearable that he wants to kill himself and because he's a chicken and cannot overdose or hang himself he goes for the most viable option as to run across a busy street in hopes of getting smashed to oblivion by a car

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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