What's better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retatrded

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a man was walking out side to get the news paper what happened next he picked up the newspaper

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What is just as real as a unicorn? World peace

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Q: What is black and can't support a family? A: A bowling ball

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What's white and yellow with red all over? Vietnam War

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Why doesn't Santa Claus like cantaloupe? Because he doesn't exist. You have to exist to like cantaloupe.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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What do you get when you hit a deer? A dead deer, which you should probably take home to eat - wouldn't want it to go to waste.

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What is Corey Jacobs favorite kind of sandwich? Big Jumbo Kahona Burger!

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Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at his genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

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Why does Sally sell sea shells down by the sea shore? To support her growing crack addiction that is ruining Sally's and Sally's families lives

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How many squirrels does it take to change a light bulb? As they can't find any, they are just squirrels, they can not asist little timmy choking on the lightbulb rolling around on the floor.

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What's worse then your mouse running away? Getting hit by a plane

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What did the mute boy get for his birthday? i dont know he didnt tell me

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You and your parents are going to die today

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what happened to the fish that got washed ashore? it died due to lack of water-borne air particles.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a truck on the way.

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One time at band camp.............tha'ts it........

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what happens when a panther and a gorilla fight? i dont know i never seen it before.

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Horse with a chair on his head.

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Why wouldn't someone want to work in the mining industry? Their dad died in the mines.

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What's big and green and would probably kill you if it fell out of a tree? A pool table.

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Thats what she said

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops