What do you say to a fat guy working out congrat him and tell him he's doing a great job and keep up the work

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What is worse than the holocaust? A worm in your apple.

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Q: What's the best way to eat lasagna A: With a fork, although a spoon is a fine substitute

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What did the man before he was executed? Nothing. He was already executed before he said something.

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There is a really funny joke which can only be seen by smart people, it goes as such:

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What ever happened to Sally? We don't know she went missing over 5 years ago.

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A talent agency is giving auditions and is just about to rap it up when a family shows up. They reluctantly agree to their "brief" audition given that they had found no suitable talent that day. The routine starts with the father starting 6 chainsaws at once while simultaneously starting a juggling/lumberjacking routine. His beautiful wife proceeds to toss him additional chainsaws (as he continually throws them for dramatic effect) while also maintaining a hypnotizing dance which seems to drain your desire to leave from your very soul. The children take turns jumping in between the chainsaws while doing a silent replay of the movie, "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon." After it plays out the father tosses the final chainsaw up in the air which lands standing straight, quivering in the dust of the studio. The studio manager says, "Why that's an AMAZING act!! I'll sign you right now! What do you call your act?" In response to which, the father shits on his desk.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got run over by a semi and died.

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What's the difference between a black male and a white female? There are many differences but all of which are wrong to make a joke about.

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your mother is so fat that her doctor advised her to stick to a strict diet and exercise routine to help her lose weight

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When I'm through with you... They will never find your body... And even if they did... All they find would be teeth!!!

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yo mamas so dumb she named her house butt and her son crack and then she called the police saying I looked all over my butt and i can not find my crack.

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What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. Your mom is the punchline.

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what do you call a black man in the dark? missing.

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What do a rubix cube and a penis have in common? The more you play with it the harder it gets.

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What do you get when you cross a cat and a dog? an email from PETA

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"Ask me a question." "No" "Cheese" ... "What?"

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Why did the man wipe his bum with a sweat-shirt? Because they were all out of toilet paper

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CHUCK NORRIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!$$$$bOoBiEs

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Life

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Why can't Ray Charles drive? Because he's dead.

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Q. What did batman say to Robin before they got in the car? A. Get in the car Robin.

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Penis.

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Why did the...uhh.... Lamp.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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