Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? I've often heard that a room with a million monkeys with a million typewriters, given enough time; would eventually reproduce the complete works of Shakespeare. This seems to suggest that if something has an extremely low chance of happening, it will still eventually happen if enough attempts are made. However, I feel that the aforementioned scenario, given enough time to play out, would only result in a room full of dead monkeys. Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter, it won't go to you anyways.

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-Children! Come inside! -Why? -We are going out...

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A black man confronts a small white man on the sidewalk and asks for money. The white man responded "no".

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My three children are three big mistakes.

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Blonde: what does IDK stand for? Brunett: i don't know Blonde: NOBODY KNOWS!!!

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If all ziggles are zaggles and all zaggles are zumbles, then why is your mother a whore?

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Hi Mum!!!!!!!!

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why did he cat not land on its feet? it had 2 legs amputated due to cancer and animal abuse

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Q) Why are there no aspirin in the jungle? A) Because it would not be financially viable to attempt to sell pharmaceuticals in the largely unpopulated rainforest

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What's sadder then a dead puppy? 2 dead puppies.

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What's purple and glows? An electric grape

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Realising the apple is the worm...

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how do you kill chuck norris. you don't

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One out of every 3 smokers dies.................. the rest gain immortality.

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What did the farmer say after the chicken started talking? Holy shit a talking chicken

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So when I came home from work the other day, I saw tha my dog was foaming at the moth, so I took him to the vet It turns out that my dog didn't have a thing for marshmallows but had rabies instead and was promptly put down.

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My asian freind died recently... But on another note why did the chicken cross the road.Crosing the road is a metaphor for killing yourself and the chicken is my asian freind.

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What do you call a guy with alot of money? A rich guy.

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If you're head weren't attached to your shoulders... you'd be dead.

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The teacher hands out tests to the students and some of the students say to the teacher "what does 'no grade' mean?" The teacher responds, "Oh I need to grade them still.")

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Whats the difference between a truck full of dead babies and a truck full of bowling balls? You can't pick up the bowling balls with a pitchfork.

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Oh look, a dead guy. He must have died

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being molested by a giant octopus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops