Knock Knock! Who's there? No one. No one is ever going to be there for you. Also, you're adopted.

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What do you call a Jew A Jew

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Roses are red Violets are blue You're daughter has terminal cancer.

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So a guy walks into a bar. It hurt really bad. He was pissed, so he went home and took his seal to a club.

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Of course, first door on your left

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Q. What's short and black A. A little black kid

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What do you call Jake Morter? Jake Morter

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89 bottles of beer on the wall, 89 bottles of beer, if one alcoholic passes the wall, 0 bottles of beer on the wall!

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How many blacks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None we have mexicans for that

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Once upon a time, A lonely man was living in the woods. He died of exhaustion, dehydration, starvation, and bacterial infection. The end. Once upon a time, Another lonely man was living in the woods. He built a house, made a well, made a farm, got married, had kids, and had a wonderful life. The end.

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Why did the woman accuse a black man of stealing from a bank? Because she was eating a cornmuffin on the bench across the street when she saw a black man,stealing money from a bank

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Q: What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A: One is a person, one is a food.

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So a pirate walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink. The bartender then looks down and realizes that the pirate has a steering wheel on his penis. "Sir, are you aware that you have a steering wheel on your penis?" the bartender asks. "Arrrrrrr! It's driving me crazy! I just woke up one day and it was there!" The pirate replied. "Well you should probably get that checked out soon, it looks like it could be very harmful to your health and slightly uncomfortable. Not to mention your penis is out in the open." "You are right, what was I thinking?" The pirate agreed. He proceeded to get his friend to drive him to a hospital, for drinking and driving is not safe, and steering wheels on penises are not healthy.

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what happened to the baseball player who couldnt throw? he was very unsuccessful, as throwing is the most important skill of the game

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-how many potatoes are in a sack -5

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"I see," said the deaf man, to the blind man, who had no ears.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey.

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every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute goes by.

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What's the difference between unicorns and black people? That whole slavery thing.

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Roses are gray, Violets are gray, Everything is gray, I'm a dog.

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Q: How do you break into your own house? A:You don't....thats ridiculous(:

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whats the difference between a bird and a turtle? they can both fly but the turtle cant

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carn ehney bodie hellp mie with mine smellings?

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Knock knock, Who's there? Pizza hut delivery service, here's your pizza, Thanks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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