What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza has cheese on it.

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry man passes, takes a look at the muffins lifts his shoulders and walks away. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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Q:Why are all of the vampires extinct? A:AIDS is a serious disease. You shouldn't joke about it.

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A man walks into a bar, he asks if the bartender knows where Starbucks is. The bartender finds this exceptable and shows him the way.

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A student often slept through his alarm, which led to a lower class attendance rate and thus a poor performance on his exam

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Why Is Six Afraid of Seven? because he is black.

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Whats more painful than falling onto a sharp stone? Suffering the loss of your mother and newborn brother in a tragic car accident on your birthday.

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Where's the dick??? east

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What did Batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile? "Robin, get in the batmobile!"

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When did joseph the deer learn to fly? - Never, deer can't fly

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Whats the first thing you do when your grandmother gets hit by a toaster? Buy a new toaster.

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A paraplegic wheels himself into a bar. The barman asks, 'What can I get you?' 'Nothing,' replies the paraplegic, 'I've just pissed myself and I need you to help me clean myself up.'

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Your mom is so ugly, that her job prospects are affected negatively, and your family suffers as a consequence.

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What did the dog say to the cat Nothing dogs cant talk

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because in between 6 and 7 there used to be the number § but 7 raped and murdered it.

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Why did old Dorris shit herself? Because Margaret fell over.

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Why couldn't the girl swing on the swing set? She had no arms.

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A man walks into a bar, the bartender goes why do you have a cane? The man goes "I'm blind."

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What happened to thepeanut who went to NYC? He was assulted

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A black man shoots some hoops. One of the bullets bounces off the rim and hits him in the eye. The man dies. His grandmother is still alive to attend his funeral.

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Q: What do Magic Johnson and Freddie Mercury have in common? A: Freddie Mercury is dead.

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So a guy with a machine gun walks into a bank, makes a deposite and leaves.

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Why couldn't the duck fly? It died.

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Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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