What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the middle of a lake? Bob

knock knock who's there? Madeline McCann really? no

When life gives you melons, your probably dyslexic.

What does a black guy do to a white girl when the lights go off and there's a bed in the room? They go to sleep so they can have enough energy to work their two jobs and provide for their family after they've been evicted from their home.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? i don't know, he hasn't unwrapped it yet

What do you get if you cross a horse with a cow? A horse and a cow.

What's the difference between a woman with an IQ of 160, and a man who is mentally challenged? The woman wasnt premature and abused from an early age.

Your mother is such a whore that she engages regularly in acts of consensual but unprotected sex with various gentlemen.

Q: what do you call a mushy green circle that tastes good? A: An avocado

KONY 2012! *world rises up cheering in spontaneous patriotism for Africa* Leader of KONY 2012 arrested for public masturbation

Whats the difference between cake and dead babies? Cakes make people happy while dead babies are a sad and disturbing sight to see.

Hi Mum!!!!!!!!

What's the difference between a dead baby and a carpet? I don't sell carpets.

Once upon a time, Ducks THE END

Why did the black guy love his new shirt? Because it was 100% cotton

Knock, knock ... ... No one answers the door because knocks produce a quieter sound than a doorbell and the residents of the house are upstairs watching a movie.

69

Who wants pizza crusts?

I forgot what came after: Roses are Red Violets are Blue Too much anti jokes

What do you call a gorilla with a banana in each ear? A gorilla with with a banana in each ear? Unless it has a name, then refer to it by it's name. be polite.

How do you kill a ninja? Shoot him with a sniper rifle from a building. How do you make sure he's dead? Shoot him twice.

A mercenary was sent from the US to kill a terrorist leader. He was captured by the terrorists but wouldn't give away any information. They beat him, shocked him, cut him, and punched him in a dark room with a light beaming right down on him like a spotlight. It was a grueling five long days until they said "We know you have the information we want, tell us or you will die!" The mercenary sat in silence. They took out a gun and pointed it to his head. The mercenary then broke down and told the terrorists the information they wanted to hear. The terrorists then shot him to death.

Why did the man cry when he was surrounded by black men? He got a call saying his mother had just died.

Selena Gomez and Justin Bieber where walking in New York . They both get ice cream... then bieber gets hit by a bus.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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