A man walks into his doctor's office He says: ''Doctor, I have said goodbeye to my family and friends and I have decided to take the pills you offered me and die peacefully in my sleep, I won't suffer any longer from my disease''. The doctor answers: ''You are in luck, we still have a few of them left''

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People Eating Tasty Animals

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Yo mama's so fat, that when she jumped, gravity pushed her back to the floor!

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What's black and white and roams the sea floor? A zebra.

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What rhymes with float,boat,moat,coat and goat but can not be on a boat, can not float, can not be in a moat, can not be on a coat and can not ride a goat? A zoat because it's not a real word and therefore is incapable of doing any of those things.

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Why did the girl get her hair cut off? Because she had cancer

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Why is the little boy sad? His parents died in a car crash.

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Why does Charlie Sheen do cocaine? Because his father was a poor role model and he's an unstable celebrity.

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Knock knock Who's there? Brittney Spears Brittney Spears who? Knock Knock Who's there? Opps I did it again.

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What is pretty, has big tits, talks like a guy, and has a dick? Your mom giving me a handjob.

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What happened when the man asked the girl if he could borrow her pencil? Nothing, she was deaf

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When life gives you lemons ....go murder a clown.

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What's worse than a cow on the ceiling? - two cows on the ceiling.

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Why was the chicken afaid to cross the road? because there was no road.

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Q: Why was the prostitute's mouth sore? A: She had multiple cavities due to poor dental hygiene.

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david weres the slug gone

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roses are red violets are blue your friend is a scumbag and so are you

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Why couldn't the hobo buy any clothes? They did not have his size available.

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Why did John McCain lose the election? He did not get as many votes as Barack Obama.

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Why do people on this website suck? Because they are n i g g e r s and jews!

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Anal.

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How do you get a clown to stop smiling? Polity ask him to stop.

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While teaching her second grade class, Mrs. Peets asks the class a question from last night's homework, "OK class, what did you get for number five, 5+12=?" A kid in the back raises his hand slowly. "Yes James?", said the teacher. The kid in the back says, "My dick is as hard as a rock, Mrs. Peets."

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Doctor Doctor i have a shoe in my braces. I bet it smells haha.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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