whats worse, being kicked in the balls or giving birth? losing an arm to meningitis

What do you do when you see an elephant with a basket ball? Engage in play - if the elephant is playing with a basket ball it is most likely domesticated, and if it has toys it's probably well treated. Well-treated elephants raised in captivity are tolerant, sociable, intelligent and playful.

What did Steve jobs tell bill gates? Please pass the salt.

Whats the difference between obama and Michael Jackson? Michael Jackson Is dead

Roses are Rose, Violets are Violet.

What did the man say to his friend? Hello.

My Penis is so big. How big is it? If you lay my penis down beside another similarly lengthy object, approximately 10" long, it would most likely surpass the length of the object you chose to measure it to.

Pete and Repeat are sitting on a bridge, Pete fell off and Repeat still hasn't been able to forgive himself for pressuring Pete to join him on such a perilous perch.

Why did the Asian eat so much rice? Because he was hungry.

why can't helen keller drive? Because she is deaf and blind.

spell backwards: taco cat

Knock Knock. Who's there? Interrupting Pessimist. Interrupting Pessi- Slavery.

What's white and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? A refrigerator.

a black man and a squirrel get hit on two different roads what's the difference? well for starters theyre two different species. a squirrel is much smaller than a human and has his own mark on society. the man will be missed dearly by his family and if the impact with the car wasnt bad, he may have a chance to make it out alive at the hospital. the squirrel however is not so lucky. it will be left to die on the street or would have died on impact already with sadly no squirrel hospital to tend to it.

What did the little girl with cancer get for Christmas? Chemotherapy.

Why did the boy throw his clock out the window? After hours of waiting for the perfect victim, the boy spotted an elderly woman walking down the sidewalk. The clock barreled through the air, hitting the old woman on the head at extremely high speeds. She was immediately killed on contact.

titanic vs 9/11 who would win? Well the titanic backwards is a ship which saves lives and 9/11 backwards is a building on fire spitting out airplanes

216-409-7176 Call me.

What's big, white, and when it falls out of a tree, it can kill you? A refrigerator.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you simply have a chicken joke WITHOUT it crossing the road

what is blue purple and has wings what i dont know that why i am asking you

A guy walks into a bar. He loses conciseness because of the force of the metal bar hitting his skull.

Q : What did the construction worker get for christmas? A: Nothing a building fell on him 3 days earlier

What is the delicate way to start talking about your penis? ...that wasn't it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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