Why did a black man bring a baseball bat to a white man's apartment? Because he was stopping by his friends house before heading to a rousing game of baseball.

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What starts with D and ends with ICK? Drumstick.

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A squirrel is about to steal the eggs of a sparrow when the sparrow suddenly says, "Stop! I will do anything if you would spare my eggs!" The squirrel has no capacity to reason and so steals the eggs anyway. The sparrow is devastated.

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What do you call a black man approaching your car in uniform whose name happens to be Darius? Officer Darius.

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i hate christians and muslims, until drugs are involved. iduno what dat is, i try it.

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KNOCK KNOCK who's there? hello is anybody there? hello?....... .....the number your trying to reach has been removed please hang up the door knob and put the squirrel back in the lawnmower were belongs

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What is the difference between 1000 dead babies and a Cadillac? I don't have a Cadillac in my garage.

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BF:Roses r red Violets r blue a face like ur's shuld b i n the zoo but dont worry i'll be there but not in the cage but laughing at u. GF:Wanna c a magic trick? POOF ur single

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What is the difference between a blond and a red-head? They have different hair colors.

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What did one chick in a clothes shop say to another? That's cheap

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what did one soldier say to the other... dude take your finger out my a** it has been that long

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"Guess what I was doing in my room last night with the door closed with my hand?" "Please don't say what I think you're going to say" "What? I was just cleaning my room."

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how do you make a plumber cry A: kill his family

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What do an airplane and a strawberry have in common? They can both fly.... Except for the strawberry

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How do you make a clown sad? Brutally murder his children.

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Is it closer to Minneapolis, or by bus?

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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A man walks into a bar, he obtains an alcoholic beverage from the store neighboring this bar which he bumped into.

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What do you call a person that smells like shite and chases uglier girls than him? .. . . . . . . .. . . . . . Smelly McD the smelly cunt

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Women's Rights

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What did the mentally retarded man say to the Waiter who brought him his soup? Thanks for bringing me my soup.

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how many toyota's does it take to pee on a soccer game 900 because isis is a cat vagina

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Why was ticklish Tom not ticklish anymore? A: he got hit by a train

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A little boy uses a horrible curse against his classmate. The classmate is so angry he tells the teacher. The teacher is so astounded at the little boy's use of language he sends him to the principal. When the principal hears of the foul language he's so ashamed he calls the police. The police can't believe the little boy said such a bad word, they think he deserves to go to court. The court dates are set up. When the Judge hears of the hate words he can think of no other worthy punishment except prison until he turns 21. After the kid is let out he heads for the bar across town where all the ex-prisoners go. He orders up a drink, bartender asks "What'd you do?". The kid explains the curse to the bartender. The barkeep becomes so upset that he kicks the kid out of the bar. While crossing the street to go to another bar he gets hit by a truck. Whats the moral of the story? Look both ways before crossing the street....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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