What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter. It won't come to you regardless what you call it.

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What do you call a black guy in a Walmart? A customer. You prejudice dullard!

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Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy, But I have cancer.

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whats blue and looks like a bucket? a red bucket disguised as a blue bucket

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What's funnier than the Holocaust? The Holocaust is not an idea of the slightest humor at all. Millions of innocent civilians were slaughtered, millions more were sent to brutal concentration camps where they would fight for a crumb of food on the ground and get terribly punished for it, and live their whole lives in pain, torture, and starvation, millions more were sent to concentration camps then murdered, and millions of people, including children were left without family or anywhere to live. On top of that, their whole lives they were mistreated for their differences, and never got to live up to their dreams because of this horrifying event. It left the world in shock for years after, and scars of the event still live on in present-day families whose ancestors were harmed in the Holocaust. The terrible memory of it will never leave this Earth.

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whats thin, long and hard? A: a pen is

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Where can you find a good lawyer? At a reputable law firm.

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What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

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why do jews have such big noses? A: it has been inherited through many generations

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What do you get when you cross a cheetah and a zebra? A dead zebra.

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? Pizza guy. Just a minute, I have to grab my wallet.

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A black van approaches a small boy. The boy gets in the van, and the van drives away.

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What's the difference between a baby and an onion? One is a vegetable and the other is a human being.

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What do you call 10 Asians playing basketball? A group of friends hanging out and having a good time.

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What do you call a black man in space? An astronaut.

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Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? No, but considering there has not been a single man to walk on the moon since 1972, it'd be difficult to generate any kind of revenue on this natural satellite.

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I found out I had asthma earlier today. I was breathless.

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A Chinese man, a Mexican man and an African man walk into an American bar. None of them know any English and can not order a drink. They walk out promptly, frustrated by the difficulties of living in a strange new world where they don't speak the native language.

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Whats invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts

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Why was the pirate not allowed into the movie? tickets were sold out

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Get off my porch.

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3 Chinese brothers (chu, bu, and fu) come to America and want to change there names. Chu becomes Chuck, Bu becomes Buck, and Fu becomes Tom because obscenities do not make acceptable names.

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Person 1: Hey how's your day? Person 2: Good Person 1: Cool

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Why didn't the man get to see his family on Christmas? He was blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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