Isn't everyday "black tie optional"?

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Johnny had 50 candy bars. He ate 45 of them. What does Johnny have now? Diabetes. Johnny has diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

what did the egg say to the boiling water? itll take a while to get hard cause i just got laid by a chick.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Your momma's so fat that she has a body fat percentage of 37 and is clinically overweight.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's the difference between girl scouts and boy scouts? Girl scouts are usually females and boy scouts are usually males.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey!!!" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the little girl fall from the swing? She's got no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's big,long,and mostly men use it? A submarine

thumb_up thumb_down +14

There were two busses. The one was red, the other one went to France.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

their were 2 muffins. one said hello how are you. the other screamed "A TALKING MUFFIN"

thumb_up thumb_down +14

its all aodhan

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the man tell the other man to shut up? The other man said something that made this particular man mad which drove him to tell the other man to shut up.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the Crippled Orphan get for Christmas Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A young child drops his ice cream and began to cry. Why are you crying asks his mother Because I dropped my ice cream said the child

thumb_up thumb_down +14

whats funny about a jew burning? Nothing......

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the muslim cross the road? To get to the other Saiid.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

One day, an Irishman, a Jew and an American were walking home from a long game of golf. "God, that was a long game" said the American, to which the Irishman replied "aye, that it was." The Irishman then turned to the Jew, and asked him how he managed to get two birdies in succession. The Jew, after a moment of deliberation, began to explain. "Well, it all began when I was six. See, there was a mountain right next to Casparia, the village I lived for most of my life back in Wales. Every day, I'd come back from school, and ask my dad why nobody ever attempted to scale the mountain. 'To do so would be an unnecessary risk, son, and people are too busy working to put food and water on the tables for their families to undertake something so foolish.' One night, when insomnia was getting the better of me, I decided to get a better look at the mountain, so I strapped on my boots, my fur coat and some woolly mittens and left for the mountain. After a few hours of walking, I approached the closest hill which gave me a perfect view of the mountain's first peak, and there I spotted a polar bear, mauling a hiker to death." The Jew paused to check the Irishman and the American were following, when the American spoke up; "hold on there, there aren't any polar bears in Casparia!" The Irishman also spoke up; "there isn't even a village called Casparia, well, anywhere!" The Jew smiled slightly, and a few seconds later the smile broke out into a gigantic grin, and he finally replied: "exactly".

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the girl fall out of the swing? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A Boy Walks Up To A Frog At the Bus Stop And Says, “Why Are You So Upset?” And The Frog Replied, “I’m Waiting For The Bus Because My Car Just Got TOAD!”

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why was the boy not feeling well? He swallowed a piano.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Whis a racist rapist etter than a non-racist rapist? less women getting raped

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A man walks into a bar, has a drink, pays the bartender, and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you can a Brazilian woman wearing a bikini? It depends on the case, but usually Brazilian women are named "Maria", "Ana", "Júlia" and many others kinds of names, with their root being hispanic, portguese and latin lenguages. Respectively, the names quoted have the English translation being "Mary", for Maria, "Anne", for Ana, and July, for Júlia.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's funnier than a dead baby? A lot of things, because a dead baby isn't funny at all.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops