What's harder than winning an argument with a woman. Lonsdaleite which has recently been declared the hardest substance known to man, and can withstand 58% more stress than the hardest diamond crystal.

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A plane full of atheists, with one Christian, crashes into a field over Ohio. Everybody but the Christian dies upon impact. Amazed, a news reporter on the scene of the crash, asks the man, "How did you suvive this tragic event?" "I had a parachute." Responds the man.

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why did the building fall down the terrorists came back

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Two pies where sitting in a oven when one of the pies says: God damn it's hot in here. The other pie screams out loud: HOLY SHIT A TALKING PIE!

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Why did the girl fall off the swing Because she had no arms

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Why was the orange so serious? He was trying to concentrate.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To find some grain.

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why did the duck fall in the water? It got shot

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A blind man, a black man and a rabbi walk into a bar. The blind man trips violently.

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What did 7 say to 6? I hear you've been spreading stories about me.

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Wendy went for a walk every day in the forest. Why not today? She was shot yesterday

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Roses are red Violets are blue and oranges are orange nothing rhymes with orange

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10 mexicans were driving in a car and went off a cliff. what happend? No one cares.

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How do you get a one armed Pollack out of a tree? Hold his family at gunpoint.

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why did the black boy read a book. Because he had a book report due next week

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24

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What do Alexander the Great and Kermit the Frog have in common? Their middle name.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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How many fat Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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Do you want to hear a funny joke? Me too.

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Why couldn't Sophie brush her hair? She had Leukemia

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Yo mama's so fat, she weighs 283 pounds.

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Why did the stoner cross the road? He didn't. He was stoned

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I once saw a picture of a man who was bloodily murdered with his testicles replacing his eyes. then i had a nightmare, that was completely unrelated

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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