Yo momma's so fat, she had a heart attack and is currently hospitalized.

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, and says nothing. Ducks are incapable of speech and therefore it would be physically impossible for a duck to say anything. Where the duck walks up to does not partake in the matter.

Yo momma's so fat that all the children within a close proximity of your home think that your mother is a very large woman.

yo mama so fat she has diabetes.

What did pinocchio want to become? Hepatitus free.

Two men walk into a bar.........ouch.

Are you Drew?

A Christian walks in into a bar . . . mitzvah.

what did the fat guy say to the girl ill make fun of you because i have bigger tits than you

Q:Which do you take out more...trash or recycle? A: Greenery

Your all fags

Why was the boy crying? Because he had previously driven over innocent civilians who were all constipated and had now caused a mild to extremely large shitstorm.

How many elephants can you fit in a car? depends how big the car is!

Knock Knock Who's there? Nobody cause your a loser.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

Look how far I can kick this bucket

While I was walking home from school one day, James Brown jumped out of a bush and punched me in the face. Then, when I got home, there was a walrus sitting on my couch. He then turned to look at me and said, "Penis". I then immediately farted out blades of grass.

Why did the girl fall of her chair? The chair can only hold so much weight.

What's long and hard? The Ap European exam that i just took.

A man works at a brick factory. He is told by his boss that if he is to steal any brick from the factory, he will be sacked. But every day the man steals one brick and puts it in his lunch box to take home and is not caught. One day he has enough bricks to build a house, and he says "When I build this house there will be none left over". The house is now built and while the man is taking a look around he stubs his toe on something, he looks down to see a brick and he sighs, picks up the brick and throws it in the air. There are two pilots driving a plane, one has a dog and one has a wardrobe. One pilot says to the other "I don't particularly like dogs" then the other pilot says to him "I don't really like wardrobes". They then make an agreement and throw both the wardrobe and the dog out the window. Five minutes later one pilot looks out the window out onto the plane wing, and guess what he sees? A brick.

Knock knock! Who's there? Luke. Luke who? Leukemia.

What's green and looks like a red apple? A green apple

Haikus are awesome, but sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

What did the Nazi put into the oven? Bread.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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