My grandmother always said "slow and steady wins the race."...... She died in a fire

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Roses are red Here's something new Violets are violet NOT F**KING BLUE

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Whats the difference between Steven Hawkin and Gary Glitter? Ones severely disabled and ones a paedophile.

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A duck flew calmly through the air and landed softly on a beautiful lake, where he was then shot for trespassing.

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Knock Knock Whos there? It's me Ben. You just told me to come over. We are going jogging aren' we? Oh ya, sorry. I forgot the time. Is it cold out? Ya, it is pretty cold. You should bring a jacket. Ok, let me go get my jacket. Alright, can u grab me a water please? Ya sure. Thankyou.

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What do you call love at first sight? A broken heart.

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I am nobody Nobody is perfect Therefore, I am perfect

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A blonde walks into a bar. She just graduated university and thought she would celebrate with a beer.

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Q: What can you never see in the light, but you can in the dark? A: Darkness.

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I was sitting next to a man with jelly in one ear and peanut butter in the other, so I turned to him and said "Are you a trifle deaf?" and he said "No, I'm mentally ill."

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What is yellow and corny? Corn.

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whats dead and gone your nanas cat

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A blonde and a brunette nearly fell off a cliff and were hanging on for dear life. The brunette found the strength to climb back onto the ledge. The blonde was impressed and had muscular dystrophy so she lost the strength to hold on any longer and fell to her death.

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ati jokes are not to be funny. what about u

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And the Lord said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.

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What would Hitler say if you give him a sandwich? Thankyou!

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How do you get to pigs in a pen? Move them.

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What's worse than stepping on a snail? Stepping on a bear trap.

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What's yellow and goes up and down? A banana in an elevator.

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A Priest, Rabbi, and a Minister walk into a bar... i forgot the rest of the joke, but your mothers a whore!

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What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

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What do you call a dragon with no wings? A komodo dragon

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what do you call a football team without players a group of coaches

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? -getting raped by 10 very hung men who go balls deep

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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