Whats the difference between Justin Bieber and Lady Gaga? one of them is a women the other one is not.

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What rhymes with Hitler? Walt Disney.

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Why does Santa wear sleigh bells? Because he's got leprosy.

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A zucchini is walking down the street, when he spots a cucumber club on his left hand side. Having nothing else to do he decides to walk in. When he walks into the club all of the cucumbers stop and stare at this strange being in their club. Finally, after having one too many drinks, one cucumber decides that this ridiculousness has gone on long enough and it is up to him to say something, so he goes up to the zucchini and says, "Hey buddy, what's your problem, clearly you are in a cucumber club and you're a zucchini." The zucchini just looks at him, puzzled, and responds " A cucumber club? I thought this was a ucumber club!!!!!"... It's funny because zucchinis are dyslexic.

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What do you do with a pickle jar full of semen? Use it for gel, because it took so long to collect it all, and you're frugal person who believes in recycling.

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what do you do when you see a black guy with half a face. call an ambulance because hes most likely in serious pain

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Where does someone who has lost his arm, has a bleeding head, is mentally ill, has strep throat, and lung cancer go? Too late, they died.

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PLEASE DONT READ THIS OR YOU'LL BE DIED IF YOU DONT THUMBS UP THIS LIKE POST THIS ON 20 MESSAGES OR YOU'RE BEST MAKE THE MOST OF YOUR LIFE WITHIN THE NEXT 7 DAYS

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What did the bat say to the human? Nothing because bats make too high of frequency noises for humans to understand

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Roses are yellow Violets are yellow bark bark

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What's the diffrence between one black guy and another black guy. One of them has Aids.

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DONT READ THIS. YOU WILL BE KISSED ON THE NEAREST POSSIBLE FRIDAY BYrnTHE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE.TOMMOROW WILL BE THE BEST DAY OF YOUR LIFE. NOWrnYOU'VE STARTED READING THIS. DON'T STOP. THIS IS SO FREAKY.rn1. say your name ten times.rn2.say your mom's name five times.rn3. say your crushes three timesrn4. paste this to four other groups.rnIf you do this, your crush will kiss you on the nearest Friday.rnBut if you read this and do not paste this, then yournwill have very bad luck.rnSEND THIS TO 5 GROUPS IN 143 MINUTES. WHENrnYOU'RE DONE PRESS F6 AND YOUR CRUSH'S NAME WILL APPEAR IN BIG LETTERSrnON THE SCREEN. THIS IS SO FREAKY BECAUSE IT ACTUALLY WORKSrnrnrn

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Your mama's so stupid... She scored below average on a recent IQ test.

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Q.sam is 18 years old, why can't she get her licence? A.because Sam is a lost dog on the street

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Q:why did the man jump of the house A:he did not I threw a frige at him

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How is a raven like a writing desk? It isn't.

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Why black guys are the fasttest runners? Because the slowers are already in prison

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An Englishmen, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar, and ordered a beer. They later went home and slept. They woke up the next morning with a slight hangover.

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, Im a dog. RUUUFFF!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He looked both ways and saw there was no traffic.

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why did the plane crash? the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Two blondes are out for a walk when they come across some tracks, they realise they are train tracks and move out of the way to make sure they aren't hit by a train.

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Why was the child lying in the scrap yard? because he was being torn apart by guard dogs.

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EVERYBODY THUMB THIS JOKE DOWN

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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