How do you get a baby into a bowl? Use a blender. How do you get the baby out of the bowl? Tortilla chips.

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What's the same about a crouton and a pencil case? Both are used for dirty things, such as shoe tying.

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I dont know, are you a tomato?

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Why was the squirrel late for work? Because the traffic was nuts!

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How did the blind man watch T.V? With the captions on.

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Chuck Norris can count from 1 to 100... twice!

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a man got hit by a truck in brooklyn, JK he got shot, he was in brooklyn, Duh, he stumbled out in to traffic afterwards

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What did Helen Keller say after the Iron Maiden show? Nothing, she is a mute.

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Why did the banana explode? Because it was a grenade!

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What is worse than going to school without your homework? Going to school naked without your homework.

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Q:Whats worse than a worm in apple? A:The Holocaust. Q: What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? A: Were both lawyers! :D Q: What happens when you throw a purple rock in to a green river? A: It splashes

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What's black and blue and lives in a kitchen? A 1940's housewife.

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Whats Black and blue My wife after i beat her ass.

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how do 2 gay guys walk... one pounces into the others butt

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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The cat climbed a tree. It didn't want to come down, so it starved to death.

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charlie sheen losing

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why did the plane crash? because fenton was driving it..."THE DEER HAD TO DIE"

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What do you call a guy with newmonya? Not good at spelling

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Meow.

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why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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Goldilocks walks into a bar. But its not really a bar, it's a bear cave and she is eaten by porridge eating bears.

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What do you call a dead, black child? Dead.

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what did the black man say to the white girl? He respectfully asked her out on a date and theyve been happily dateing ever since.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops