Two muffins are in an oven. It was a really small batch.

A bold man said "well, here goes nothing!" Moments later, thats what happened

What's worse? Cleaning a New York bathroom, or getting stabbed. WELL I DON'T GIVE A GOD DAMN!!! They both suck!

want to hear a bird joke? no well, this is hawkward

What's the difference between a duck? An armchair because the vest has no sleeves.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Your moms face is turning purple. I'm coming for you.

Why did hitler commit suicide He looked at his gas bill

Why did the man fall off the cliff? I pushed him????????

A guy walks into a bar. He's thirsty and wants a beer.

Knock Knock Who's there? Bob Bob Who? Bob the human.........

why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer left the gate open and chickens typically wonder with no obvious pattern to their movements.

A white man and woman are married and the wife becomes pregnant. However, the wife has been having an affair with an African American man. The baby turns out to be white and so the woman was very fortunate or else the husband would have figured it out for sure.

How much coke can Charlie Sheen do? Enough to kill two and a half men.

A guy walks into a bar and says "hey can I get a strong drink" and the bartender says "no we don't allow blacks in this bar" and he was then pushed to the ground and thrown out.

Salad. It's green and so is The Hulk.

How do you know that an elephant has been in your refrigerator? The door is ripped off and the refrigerator is lying on it's side. All the shelves are strewn around the floor and your food has been partially eaten or simply crushed. You also have costly damage done to your house and most likely a frightened elephant in your house

Knock knock, Who's there? To get to the other side

Q: Do you know what really makes me smile? A: Facial Muscles.

What's worse than being held hostage? Waking up and finding dick your mouth

Q. Why did Mary fall down the steps? A. Because she had no legs.

This is not a joke.

Holy fuckfarts! I did mention I am at my mothers place right? What am I saying? What am I typing? Marry me now!

knock knock who's there Alec Baldwin I just raped your children ..........

Dude? What. Dude? What! Wheres my car?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...