What's worse than finding a band aid in your Crock-pot? Finding a Crock-pot in your band aid.

knock knock - whos there whos there -"im confused" try it on someone

why cant the porcupine marry the balloon? ...neither one can talk.. obviously.

Today we eat large amounts of pizza. The one piece had a lot of mushrooms. Like more than the other pieces. The cheese was flawless except for the burnt edges.

what do a blonde and a brunette have in common? They were both red-heads until they walked into great clips.

What did the orphan do on his birthday? He burned down his orphanage, he hated the place because he was severly abused.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because it saw some food, or because it felt threatened on the side of the road it was already on.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "I have a gambling problem."

a jew, a gay, and an irishman walk int a bar at different times during the span of 5 hours.

Want to hear the World's shortest joke? Peace. [L]

Mary had a little lamb, The nurse and midwife fainted. Because last year she met a ram, And they got too acquainted.

A man walks into a bar. I don't remember the rest, but your mother's a whore.

Why did the chicken cross the playground? Because he was looking for other chickens because he has no friends and he got bullied when he was in 12th grade. He got picked on because he was sledding down his hill in his backyard and he accidentally scraped one side of his face on ice and started bleeding. The next day his classmates started calling him two face.

What did the man on the moon say? ...Im on the moon.

A priest, a minister and a rabbi walk into a bar and the bartender says: "Where would you like to sit, gentlemen"?

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? He's dead.

When making an Anti-Joke, you click the button that says: 'I have read and agree to the terms of service' What are you called? A Liar.

Why did the Mr. bunny play the piano? - His wife Lannette was ill, and her last wish before she died was for him to.

How many Santa Clauses does it take to change a light bulb? Santa Claus isn't real.

Wanna hear a clean joke? A little boy took a bath with Bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is the name of the man.

Mother Mary held her daughter 20 minutes under water. Not to save her from her troubles, just to see the funny bubbles

Why did Susie fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms or legs. Why did Susie drown? Because she fell in a puddle. Knock knock Who's there Not Suzy!

how do you kill a blond? there are many ways but every one of them is illegal and could be criminally chargeable.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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