what did the panda say to the poachers? please stop killing my family.

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FAMOUS DUDE:SWAG! Thank you, thank yo- HEY NO FLASH PHOTOGRAPHY, NO YOU CANT HAVE MY-KABOOM AUDIENCE: . . . YAY CLAP CLAP CLAP.

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what is worse than throwing a dead baby off a cliff? catching one with a pitchfork!!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To buy more crystal meth to fuel his addiction while his wife and children starved in the public houses.

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What's sad about a girl getting hit in the face with a shovel? The shovel got dented..

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Why did the dinosaur rent a DVD in Redbox about a sex? Because he didn't own a Blu-Ray player.

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A man walks into a bar, orders a drink, drinks it, and leaves.

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What did the black man say tovtye chinese man? Hello sir how are you today?

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Two Mexicans were sitting in the back of a car. They were carpooling to save gas.

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Why was the woman worried? She was coughing up blood

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What did the man with candy say to the little boy? I have Candy.

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For 10 cents a day you can feed an African...they eat pennies.

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A man came home from work and said to his wife im going to kill u

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"I vant to blood your suck!" warned Darcula.

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What's black and white and red all over? A black, white, and red shirt.

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? One is a devotee of the torah, one is a delicious meal.

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I've just bought a chainsaw, and I will now decapitate you.

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Whats worse than hard cheese?Cheese DUH

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Why is the world going to end on 9 December 2014? I don't know why, but IT IS

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A panda , a cheetah, a dog, a spider, and an eagle are in Antarctica.. The eagle looks around at the other baffled animals and says " What is this????? This isn't right! I'm so confused!"

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A nun walks into a bar. She is immediately excommunicated.

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Yo momma so ugly she looks out the window and got arrested for mooning.

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A guy named M.C. walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "wheres the food?" The bartender says, " its in your stomach."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops