why did the pyromaniac burn down the house? because he is a pyronaniac, he derives pleasure from burning things.

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A black man, a gay man, and an Asian woman are sitting at a bar. The black man gets a phone call, and after the call all three of them are excited because they are all friends and the black man just got into a good college.

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What did a lot of money say? I FEEL LIKE A MILLION BUCKS!!!!!

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What do call the time things don't go the way you plan them? Reality. bitch

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What is the best part about having sex with tweny-six year olds. There are twenty of them. ap~pac

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Once upon a time there was a cowboy. He died. The end.

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how do you make a plumber cry? you kill his family!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? I was asking you...

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What do you get when you cross a hamster with a zebra? A genetic abomination that you should put out of it's misery.

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What did the bride do on her wedding day? Get married.

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Hey I just met you you are a sneaker smell my gym socks and then pick oot throughyour nose

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Feminism.

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A man walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The barman says no.

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What's worse; twelve babies in one trash can or one baby in twelve trash cans?

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Teenage pregnancy.

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Your mom is so old that her organs are starting to slowly fail and she must be put on life support or she'll die.

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What's worse than spending time with Inlaws? Spending time with outlaws.

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A man had two kids who he loved very much but would always come home in a bad mood. On a Friday after returning home, he tells his wife, "I hate my life," then proceeds to take his anger out on her. If you were expecting for this to be a joke, then you clearly have some messed up humor. Abuse in the household isn't to be taken lightly.

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Why was the baby's face red? Because it was bloody.

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What do you call a man with a spade stuck in his head? An ambulance, he may be in need of urgent medical assistance

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What happened when the Mexican lays his head on a pillow? He falls asleep

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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There is a wizard standing on a street corner. A boy walks up to the wizard and says, "Can you turn invisible?" The wizard replies, "Oh, I'm not a wizard. I'm a hobo with a long beard and a bathrobe." The hobo then proceeded to begging the boy for money.

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What do they call Chinese food in China? Food

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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