69.

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A man walks into a bar. He bumps his head on the iron and has headaches for a week.

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What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

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You are so dumb that you receive poor grades in school.

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How did the Muslim pilot die? He had a fatal heart attack while flying over the Atlantic and as a result the 300 passengers died by drowning.

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A man walk's into a bar with a monkey, I fotgot the rest of the joke. Your mom is a whore.

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Why did two girls need one cup? they didnt feel like washing an extra dish to drink their coca cola

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A teenage girl walks into a bar. She sits down and watches the TV up against the wall. The bartender walks by and says "Hello, do you have I.D." The girl says "No, I'm just here waiting for my ride." The bartender then says "Well I'm sorry to have to tell you this but you gotta be 21 or over to sit in the bar." The girl says "Okay, but is there anywhere I can wait that is safe?" The bartender asks "Why?" and the girl replies "Well, I've been hiding from my ex boyfriend. I just broke up with him an hour ago. He was very controlling and he is still not over me. So now I'm here waiting for my new boyfriend." The bartender says "What you have a new boyfriend already? Maybe that's why your ex was angry." The girl says "yeah, I know, oh look there's my ride. It was nice talking with you, have a good night."

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What did the purple dragon say to the unicorn? He doesn't say anything to the unicorn because dragons and unicorns don't exist. Even if they did exist, dragons and unicorns can't talk, unless we're talking about cartoons. Also, even if it was a cartoon or whatever, do you really think a purple dragon has ANYTHING to say to a unicorn?! Of course not! Oh look at me I'm a cool talking dragon, I have something so important to say to this unicorn. Gimme a break...

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Roses are red,violets are blue, i love the colour red and green but its a pitty because im not so keen.

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What's worse than a crying baby on a trans-Atlantic flight? A hungry lion on a trans-Atlantic flight.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have alzheimers. Cheese on toast.

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What do Justin Bieber and corn have in common? They are both fruits. Except for the corn.

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What is funnier then 25 9/11

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Q: What did the nazi say to hitler? A: You like my Auschwitz?

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A man walked into a bar. He sat down, had a nice meal and went home relatively satisfied.

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Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero? Because it is impossible, the answer is undefined.

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What's worse than dropping your loli-pop? The Holocaust

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Q: What do you call a black man with no arms and no legs? A: Whatever his first name is.

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This is not a joke, I'm just bored (or am I?)

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My cat just died.

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A man decided it was time to quit his job so he put his 2 weeks in and went to look for another job.

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(Something terribly disturbing that people find funny)

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse's mother had terminal cancer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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