How many lesbians did Tiger Woods bang? None, his standards are much higher than that

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There is a bus full of puppies and babies with a plane flying above it carrying 2 tons of explosives. The Bus arrives safely at its destination.

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If you want to make the little things count, teach midgets maths!

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.. A: Knock Knock B: Who's there? A: Not Sally

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Why is it good to date twenty eight year olds? Because there is twenty of them.

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Man- Where can I find a book on the holocaust Book keeper- Have you tried comedy? Man- no I havent Book keeper- good it won't be there

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My friends and family all recommended me for alcoholics anonymous, but all i had to say is that my father didn't raise me to be quitter.

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youre in a room with justin bieber and a gun with 5 bullets..........

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Knock Knock Whos there 9/11 nine eleven who? You said you would never forget...

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A man bought a white van, He later brutally molested a small boy.

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What is the difference between a duck? None! One of their legs are both the same.

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A man walks into a bar. His family has died in a tragic accident and he is trying to drink down the pain.

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So Joe Paterno doesn't walk into a police station....

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what's the difference between northerners and southerners? southerners live to the south of birmingham, and they don,t stink of urine.

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What did the black person say to the other black person? Im really white, I just want to fell what its like to be black.

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OMG SOHPIE IS SOOOOO GREAT AT BLOWING Josh Brown xoxo

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Reminding you of your religion. The army led by God attacked their foes at the mountains, yet had to flee because the enemy had plated steel wagons. Moral: Either God cant beat steel, or he was not there at all, its your call gents, because reading Ave Maria 50 times each time you sin, without reading the whole thing, does not even make you a Christian you FUCK (yes I can curse, you cannot)

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road? Because chickens hadn't evolved yet.

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Your mum is SO fat... She died of a heart attack

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How do you kill a blonde? Push her off a cliff.

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What's the difference between a clown and a dead baby? One makes people laugh and the other is a clown.

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Why does Santa live in the north pole? Because his spicy body fat keeps him warm.

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What kind of people have fat lips? People who have gotten punched in the lip or have suffered a serious lip injury that has caused their lips to swell up.

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What did Helen Keller say to the little boy with cancer? Hudd Wahher shelper, ghh o.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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