what happened to the slut last time she opened her legs. a bee flew in and stung her. turned out she was deathly allergic. she died a painful death.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

My name's Forrest Gump. People call me Forrest Gump.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

roses are red, violets are fine, you be the six, and I'll be the nine.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How do you scare off a ghost? Tell him your ready for a commitment.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's brown and smells like shit? My boxers.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A man walks into a sofa. BANG

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the boy drop his ice cream. Because he got hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did the smoker say when he coughed? Ohhh dam it's turned into a smokers cough

thumb_up thumb_down -15

¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯ ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ _________________________________________ That's a road. Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot that made this joke, me. And what did the idiot do? He ate it with barley. There was food poisoning. Where did the idiot's vomit go? In yo poo.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the chicken cross the road? - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - I lied, it was a goat.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

mario squashes another goomba when his wife hears of this he kills her 3 children with a gun and hangs herself.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what did the boy with cancer want for christmas? a gun

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What would Jesus say if he was alive today? “Nehwê tzevjânach aikâna d'bwaschmâja af b'arha.”

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Which is worse, 9/11 or the holocaust? Biting into an apple and finding a worm.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Your mom is so fat her daily calorie intake is dangerously above the recommended 2000 per day.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Dan walked into a jelly fish

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did one new born baby say to the other new born baby.? Babies don't have teeth therefore they are unable to talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

roses are red violets are blue do i care? no.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A japanese man enters a Honda dealership and is approached by an eager salesman. The salesman shows him a few models and then asks him curiously "What do they call Honda in Japan?" The japanese man answered "Honda"

thumb_up thumb_down -19

roses are red, violets are blue, open your legs and give me an hour.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

An over weight naked black guy walks into a bank and says "give me all your money!"

thumb_up thumb_down -19

The closest I've been to an animal charity was when I walked past it to by myself a fur coat

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What would you do for a klondike bar? Walk to the corner store to buy one.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Q. Why was 6 afraid of 7? A. Because 7 was a scary dude.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops