What's brown and seven feet tall? A door

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Q. What did the chicken do when it lost its egg? A. It went to go look for it. Q. Why was the chicken scared of the duck? A. Because it was chicken Q.Why can't chickens fly? A. Because they don't want to Q.Why can't chickens swim? A. Because they don't want to Q. Whey do chickens cluck? A. Because they want to Q. Why did the chicken jump on top of a car? A. Because it knows how Q. Why doesn't a chicken have hands? A. Because it's not human Q. What did the chicken dream about? A. Chicken dreams Q. Why was the chicken lost? A. Because it wasn't found Q. Why wasn't the chicken afriad of the dog? A. Because the chicken was blind Q. Why doesn't the chicken know how to drive a car A. Because they don't need to

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Have you seen Helen Keller's new car? Neither has Stevie Wonder.

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Why was the boy afraid? Because he had just seen his dog get ran over by a tractor

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Knock-Knock Who's there? Ketchup. Ketchup who? Ketchup-mustard.

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In mother Russia you don't eat cookie. Dog eat shark. -B.Gill

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Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M factory? Because she was a very poor worker.

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A man walks into a bar and says, "Hey, Jim, your wife just died from terminal cancer." Jim then says, "Cool. Hey, do you know if the games on tonight?"

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What did the vibrator say to the condom? Watch, I'll get laid before you do!!!

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Knock, Knock Who's there? The IRS, we're taking your house. This is a vacation notice, please be out of the property in 30 days. Have a nice day.

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What do you call a 5000 pound gorilla? Obese - gorillas should weigh around 400 pounds.

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What's black and white, and red all over? Old movies that have ketchup on them.

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How do you get the icing in the middle of a cupcake? Cupcake raper...Duh

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You can lead a fool to wisdom, but you can't make him think.

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Why did the nervous man jump out of a plane? He was sky diving.

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What's bigger than a horse ? An elephant.

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What did the man say to his wife while having sex? I don't know.

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What's worse than slipping on a banana peel? Amanda Todd's suicide.

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Guys, I think I'm gonna apply to join the Crips. My SAT score is a 2050, and their average score is a 2200. My GPA, however, is a 4.6, and their average is only a 4.2. Do you guys think that they will take me? Or should I try and apply for the Bloods?

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Math: "If I have 5 bottles in one hand and 4 in the other, what do I have?" Answer: "An unreasonable amount of bottles to hold in two hands."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The bold and unpredictable female bird escaped under the horror of the fearful fence of which enclosed the innocent chickens. As she wandered towards the nearby city of magic and dreams she approached by a large, empty road. A mysterious, shining object in the distant caught her eye. As she slowly to a shivering step towards the intereging sparkle, she was ran over by a car. EPIC FAIL LOL!!!!

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A muslim paints Mohammed

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What's black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

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Why did Poppy lose at sports day? Because she had a heart attack and died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops