Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

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How did the old man die? His family locked him in the basement and then burned the house

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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What happened when the man fell off the boat? He went into the water and was viciously mauled by 5 alligators then ran over by another boat.

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roses are red violets are blue show me your bed i wanna fuck you oh and roses are red violets are blue nice tits.

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I'm sorry but your child seems to have fractured his spinal column and can no longer control any part of his body below his neck.

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Yo momma so stupid she scored poorly on her SAT's in high school. She couldn't graduate college and now works a dead end job as a waitress.

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What did the towel say to the other towel? Nothing, there was no topic of conversation.

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What do you call a horse with two legs? A kangaroo

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roses are blue violets are red crap i screwed up dont judge me

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What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

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What did the blind man say to the mentally challenged man when he bumped into him? Watch where you're going, retard.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

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Why are the asians on cabin services? Because they do not speak english well enough to converse with guests.

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What did the black man say tovtye chinese man? Hello sir how are you today?

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Billy Idol walks into a New York City Bar. He snorts lines of coke with his comrades in the bathroom and continues his night by having sex with attractive underage females

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Ask me if I am a tree. "Are you a tree?" No.

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Rose: Mom, why was I named Rose? Mom: Because when you were born a rose petal landed on your head. Rose: Than why is my brother named Brick? Mom: I liked the name.

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What did the cricket say to the fox? Cricket.

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what happened to the retarded dyslexic? he retard on his 60th birthday and took up gardening.

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why was the tricycle lonely? the mom back over the kid in the driveway.

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How do you confuse your algebra teacher? Tell her to prove that she exists.

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what is worse than throwing a dead baby off a cliff? catching one with a pitchfork!!!!

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What kind of movies do pirates like? They don't know, Somalia doesn't have much of a film industry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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