I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road without their motives being questioned.

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Why did the girl not get her mum a christmas present? Because she was adopted to two men when she was born, so it would be hard to give her mum a present...............................................

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Once there was a giant Pringle. His family was dead, his wife committed suicide. So one day he was walking to work, when he met a genie! The genie granted him three wishes. The Pringle's first wish was to have lots of money. His second wish was to have his wife back. Before he could complete his wishing, he awoke in a hospital where he was hooked up to life support and was in severe pain. His wife wasn't really dead, but he was out drinking and accidentally walked across a motorway and got hit by a huge lorry.

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why was the fork in the wall? Why would a fork be in a wall?

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eyebrows up means ur flirting this isnt a joke dont laugh

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Your mothers so stupid she is retaking her college courses so she can get a better job and support her family.

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Why did the man go to Lourdes Because he has lost all hope

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Penis

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Tom: Knock knock! Guy: Who's there? Tom: Carrot. Guy: Impossible.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had two penises.

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Have you ever seen the movie called "The Tourist"? No

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You just died, and I'm laughing at you and your extremely ugly face.

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Why did Sally drop her Ice Cream Cone? Because her dog licked her butthole.

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My life has been getting worse and worse since I developed cancer.

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Only people of high intelligence can laugh at anti jokes.

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why did suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms why did suzie get hit by a bus? she was blind knock knock whos there? not suzie.

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Why does tundes food suck? Because he is from Africa and the cuisine is different

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A man walks into a bar. He hits his head and dies.

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The motto of those who live in the Bible Belt; "The Bible Belt: Where being obese is 'Genetic' but being homosexual is a 'lifestyle choice'."

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A cripple and a Jew walk into a bar. They sit down and begin to discuss all the stigmas that they have faced their entire lives. The conversation goes on for an hour, at which point a black man walks in. Just then, the bar explodes and they all die.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs, who got cancer for Christmas, get for his Birthday? Nothing, he didn't live that long.

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What type of party do you throw when your fat? A baby shower.

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What do you call a man whos had his arms ripped off in front of you? An ambulance, because with an injury such as this, you can die anywhere between 10 and 45 minutes

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Why was the blonde on the train tracks? Because she was tied up by a madman on crack.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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