How does Hitler tie his shoes? with little Nazis!

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

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Where do cows go in their free time? burger king.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was simply wandering around and happened to walk from one side of the road to the other.

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Lets just say some of my boys owed me a favor, and that if we where all "clean slate workers" I would never have been able to pull some favors out of the higher ups. As far as for "these Shadows" of yours, I know nothing, while I invented the encoding format for the messages you use, I intend keeping it to myself. People here will still assume this is bullshit unless you get somebody to hack this site, believe me, its pretty damn easy to retrieve whatever data might have been lost.

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Q. How many men did it take to build a wall? A. None, the wall is already built.

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What's disabled and red all over. The kid I hit with my car.

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How do you leave a guy in suspense ...

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Two muffins are in the oven They didn't say anything.

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How can a black person and a white person be friends? The civil right's movement.

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A guy went to McDonalds and asked for a cheeseburger: —Can I have a cheeseburguer? —No

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was trying to commit suicide through vehicular manslaughter and knew that the average human being would not be able to stop before it was too late.

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Because the tractor hadn't seen the chicken.

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What is the similarity between John W. Booth and Pee Wee Herman? They both got arrested for shooting someone in the back of the head in the theater.

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What do you call a rapist who uses condoms and excessive lubricant? A Rapist.

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A Duck, a Mexican guy and Helen Keller walk into a bar. The bartender asks "What do each of you want?" The duck doesn't respond because is is a duck. The Mexican guy doesn't respond because he doesn't know English that well. Helen Keller does't respond because she is dead.

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender asks the duck "What'll it be?" The duck doesn't respond because it's a duck and it can't talk.

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I? Everett

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what do u call a kid at school a school kid and i have enough of these anti jokes they are not funny

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What did the Asian man say to the taxi driver? Diarrrhea

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I once heard a funny joke, it was as funny as a funeral

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Why couldn't the melons get married? As gay cantaloupes, their jurisdiction didn't allow for same-sex marriage.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas many gift card to stores he liked

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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