If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put my sausage in your oven

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Q: What does a bunny and a plum have in common? A: They're both purple except the bunny.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was a woman

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A sandwich walks into a bar. The barman says, "We don't serve food here." The sandwich charges the barman for discrimination.

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What do you do when a burglar breaks into your house and tries to kill and rape you and you family? Nothing, he as an AK-47 and shoots you all dead and then has sex with your corpses.

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Whats 9 plus 10 ... WHO FREAKIN CARES! STUPID.

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Q: What did the vomiting man say to his friend? A: BLEEEAAARRRGGHH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to his wife? A: BLAAAARRRRRGGGHHH!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the waiter in the restaurant? A: BLAAAAAARGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to Leonardo DiCaprio? A: BLEEEEAAAARRGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the convenience store clerk? A: BLAAAAAARRRGGGGHHHH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to your mom? A: BLAAAARRRGGGHH!!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to Barack Obama? A: BLAAAARRRRRGGHHHH!! Q; What did the vomiting man say to the King of Saudi Arabia? A: BLAAAAAAAAAAAEEEAAARRGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the bartender? A: BLLLEEEEAAAARRGHHHH!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the funeral home director? A: BLLLEEEAAAARRRGGGHHH!!

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Why did the airplane crash? The pilot had a stroke.

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They found Michael Jackson dead in his house and found Madeleine McAnn in the cupboard 8P

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Why do I have a Virtual Boy?

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Jennifer Kim... having a boyfriend!

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Q: what happens when Justin Bieber walks into bar? A: three things, blood on the bar floor, another vister at the celebrity hospital, and Justin Bieber with knifes and darts stuck in his chest!

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Run, Run, As fast as you can, You can't catch me, I'm in a car.

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An Ethiopian fell into an alligator infested river. He ate 7 of them before he got out.

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What's the difference between a duck and a popsicle? I don't shit on hamsters.

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How do you call the uncle who molested you as a child? More than likely with a telephone.

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How do you get a baby in a bowl? You put it in.

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Y didnt the grandma go to christmas? She died on thanksgiving

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Hej Erik och Leo!!

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Nathaniel Nugnes walks into a bra

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in a car crash an entire family is killed from death until they all die

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How did the black man survive the Train crash? He didnt, he died liked everyone else

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what do you make if you get a cow, then kill it. ...Steak

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There's a football player who walks into a bar and sees a gay guy. The gay guy says, "So you're a football player, right?" The football player says, "Yes." The gay guy says, "I have a game of football myself. It's called fart football. It's where you drink a mug of beer in less than five seconds and then you drop your pants and fart for the extra point." The gay guy goes first. He drinks the mug of beer in less than five seconds and farts. The football player goes. He drinks the mug of beer in less than five seconds then he drops his pants and before he farts, the gay guy says, "BLOCK THAT KICK! BLOCK THAT KICK!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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