An alien spacecraft picks up human transmissions from Earth. They continue on in silence and disgust.

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what did the robot say to the centipede? "Stop being a centipede!" It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

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What say the mirror if i look in it,? He died

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Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7,8,9

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What do you call a poor man on the side of the rode asking for money? A poor man on the side of the rode asking for money.

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what did the banana say to the orange? nothing because a banana is a fruit

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"Why did Jim Jones put cyanide in the People's Temple Flavor Aid?" Because he understood that adding sugar would be bad for their teeth.

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What's a Mexican's favourite sport? Cross-country running.

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Q: Why do all Asians have small penises? A: They don't.

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y do black people always have nightmares because we killed the one who had a dream

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What does and elephant and me have in common. Everything, I am an elephant.

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What's a black man that drives a bus? A bus-driver

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Why did blonde cross the road? She needed to get to work.

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Why do things made by Glen taste so good? Because he has mastered the cream

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Grandpa loved a good joke, he died laughing. The doctor said it was a severe stroke probably brought on by smoking aggravated by high cholesterol and high blood pressure.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

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What did the the water hose say to the man? Nothing, but the sight of water made the man thirsty and he drank to excess and died from dilution of his blood.

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haha women's rights.....what a joke.

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Q: What does a bunny and a plum have in common? A: They're both purple except the bunny.

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It is wrong to strip a homeless man of his clothes and chew his face off. Note to self: Explain this to someone before they have taken bath salts.

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how do stick a dead baby into a blender and why???????? feet first so u can see the reaction on top.

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What's worse than seeing another antijoke with "The Holocaust" punchline repeated? The Holocaust.

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A horse walked into a bar. The bartender said "why the long face?" The horse then panicked, and feeling threatened, it kicked the bartender with its hind legs and galloped out of the bar. A civilian took immediate control of the situation and dialed the number for animal control, who arrived shortly and tranquilized the deer and put it back in its natural habitat. Don't worry, that didn't actually happen

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Q: What are the best kind of jokes? A: The funny ones.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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