-What animal has the best vision? -I hate when you try to talk dirty during sex

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how did the woman get her baby to stop crying? she hit him with a axe

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A dog walks into a bar, animal control is called and he is put down as he is suffering from rabies.

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What do you call a dog? A cat. What do you call a cat? A banana.

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? An X-box, a sweater and some socks.

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What time is it? If I hadn't poked your eyes out, you might know.

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What's sad about Justin bieber getting thrown off of a cliff Nothing

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why are black people so good at basketball? Because they practice

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what is big white and hurts when it falls on you out of tree? A refrigerator

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A black man and a white man were on an island. They lived in England.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Johnny Johnny who? Johnny your son let me in mom! Son, I have something to tell you. What? Well, you're actually adopted *sobs*

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What's Red and bad for your teeth? A Brick

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What happens when you cross a Labrador and a Poodle. A species of dog that has been cross bred.

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why did sally fall off the swing cause she had no arms knock knock who's there? not sally

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Stevan Hawkings walked into a bar. Ohh shit :/

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watch a i d s left

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

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What's 1+5 2+4 3+3 4+2 5+1 Whats 6+1 If you said 6 you're stupid.

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Why do black people have nightmares? Because we killed the only one with a dream.

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What do you call someone without legs or arms laying at your front door? Steve

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Q: Why did the grandma forget to take her pills? A: She died in a tornado

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So there is this moose and he goes to a grocery store and asks, "where are the potatoes?" the employee says "aisle 5" and when the moose checks in aisle five, there are no potatoes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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