what did the little girl with no legs and no arms get for christmas? Cancer

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A blind man walks into a bar. I mean a fence.

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Your momma is so fat that she decided to begin an exercise program and eat healthy and she lost weight.

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Why did the teenager turn in his work on time? He chose not to procrastinate.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey Im a dog

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Bugsys back back back again with a brand new track cumming on megs back back back with a new boxing cap cap cap, stealing millions from banks having a wank coz hes a lanky cockney mong

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What happened when the lawyer went surfing? A shark came up and tore his leg off.

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A man walks into a bar wearing large and baggy pants. The bartender asks him, "Why the large, baggy pants?" The man replies, "Because they're comfortable."

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A kid had wild unprotected sex. He didn't get an STD or enpregnate the girl.

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What is the difference between being a serial killer and a doctor? I'm not a doctor.

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Why? Because.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Hello there. I am Elder Young and I with the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. What would you say if someone were to offer you peace and happiness through all of eternity?

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. This poem sucks. I like math!

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whats the difrence between santa clause and a jew santa goes down the chimney

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why do muslims always turn to their left? Because they don't have their rights.

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What do you call a police officer who kills a black person? Innocent

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why did the kid drop his ice cream? Because he got hit by the ice cream van

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How do you keep the crime rate down in a black neighborhood? Blow everybody up all at one time.

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whats worse than breaking your arm? getting raped by a squirel

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What do you call a spider with no legs? A spider.

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What's worse than a baby on a mattress? A baby under a mattress.

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While running away a burgular cut his hand on a piece of glass. He fell to the ground bleeding like crazy. What did the police say when he saw the burgular? You've been caught red handed.

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I dunno, I dont grade love, I want to see you, touch you, bang you (sorry for not having the guts to use a nicer word, but I am tired and that is what I have in me now) And while that makes me sound like some hippy, I am very fucking picky about who I spend time with, and when. And I got no male friends, waste of time, why spend time with guys when I can spend time with chicks. Excuse me, just need my meds, speaking of sincerity, yeah I use medications, wont tell you what, but its well, not for my "mental disorders" I was born crazy, and I am going to die like I live: INSANE.

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Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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