What do a Jew and a whale have in common? They're both Jewish. Except the whale.

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What kind of movies do pirates like? They don't know, Somalia doesn't have much of a film industry.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? You reading another one of these again?

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What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

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the only thing i learned in geometry is when you push two circles together it makes a titty venn diagram

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What brown and squishy? um um um um melted kit-kats

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Yes

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Q: a black man and a mexican are in a car. Whos driving? A: The mexican. They're going to the bookstore to get some books.

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why is 6 afraid of 7 because 7 is slenderman and he is chasing 6

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What did one dog say to the other dog? Bark.

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What did the man with candy say to the little boy? I have Candy.

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The man said to his wife love hurts. the wife then progressed with punching in the face.

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What time is it when you run out of ice cream? Time to get more ice cream.

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Roses are red Violets are purple. I just realized that nothing rhymes with "Purple".

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There once was a girl with only one buttcheek. She couldn't go poop. She died.

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Why was Joe lying on the ground? Because he got shot.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

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Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell in the mud…

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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What is blue and has to deal with a vagina. Blue waffle you know who has that Jews But the jews got it from the gassing and the gassing got it from hitlers wifes piss but the blue waffle came from the lesbian she had sex with when she was doing her lesbian phase but the lesbian got it from her father and the father got it from his wife.

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Three children had stumbled upon a magic slide. There was a sign on the slide stating that what ever they shouted, they would land in a pool of it at the bottom of the slide. So the first child began sliding and shouted out "JELLY" and sure enough he landed in a large pool of jelly when he reached the bottom of the slide. The next child, so excited to go down the slide began sliding down. She shouted out "LOLLIES" and sure enough she landed in a large pool of sweets and chocolates at the bottom of the slide. Finally, the youngest girl in the group mounted the slide. As she was going down she was enjoying the slide so much that she shouted "POOS POOS" forgetting the rule of the magic slide and finally landing in a large pool of excrement.

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whats the difference between a baby and an onion? no one cries when u chop up a baby.

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A guy walks up to his boy and tells him, "Hey, if you don't stop masturbating you'll go blind." The boy says, "Who are you? Your not my father."

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Why did the black man cross the road? He was chasing the chicken

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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