How do you make a baby fit in a bottle? Blender.

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What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

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If the 49ers won the superbowl

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What is long, hard, and full of seamen? a school bus, if you consider children to be seamen

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Katy perry isn't on clould nine because it's physicaly impossible to stand on water persipitation.

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what do you call a black man in a cop car? a policeman

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What Do you say to an atheist after he sneezes? Bless you. Its just polite

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"Knock knock" Come in!

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Why is Lewis hayphore gay Answer = because he sucked hos brother off #Cameron Hayphore

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25

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Your mom is so stupid that she was unable to make it into the college of her choice.

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What do a van and a pencil have in common? You can write with both, except with the van.

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Kids, your mother and I thought we should tell you this now... You know our dog sparky? Well he... was actually Osama bin Laden and is now dead!

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I'm not wearing underwear. Why? Because I have built in underwear. :)

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Getting raped..

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There are two muffins in a oven, the first muffin is chocolate chip and the second muffin is blueberry.

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A man walks into a bar with a couple of chickens by his side. He sees a man sitting at the bar drinking a beer. The man who's drinking the beer offers the other man a seat, and asks him to join him in the drinking. The other man hardly refuses and takes the beer from the other man and throws it on the floor, breaking it. The man sitting at the bar asks him why he did it. The man answers: "My chickens don't like beer"

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A blond, brunet, and redhead were stranded on an island. With in a week they all died of starvation.

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Q Whats the difference between a pich fork with watermelons and a pitch for with dead babies stuck on. A The pitchfork with the dead babies were severly shot in the kidneys and then the heart. Blake

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How do Asians name their children? They throw them down the stairs and see what sound they make.

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"Knock Knock" "Who's There" "The Police" "The Police Who" "Ma'am your son just died in a car accident"

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So a man and his wife were in a horrible car accident. The man died, so why isn't the wife mourning his death? Because she is also dead. But, do you know who did mourn and cry over this horrible tragedy? Their children, other family members, and friends.

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Q: how do you get an clown off a unicycle A:You hit it with a police baton

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Every time I walk across the street I do the Hitler march and raise my arm straight out to salute him, if I feel like holding up traffic, I take smaller steps

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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