How do you remind your kids of family? You brand them with the family crest.

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Your momma's so stupid, she has a lower than average IQ!

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why couldnt the baby walk through the door? because it had a javeline through its head.

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What's most weird about necrophilia? They copulate with dead bodies.

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Why are there no casinos in Africa? Because of the exceptionally high poverty rate.

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What is black and white, and red all over? I don't know that's why I was asking.

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What do you call black people working in a field? Farmers.

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Why couldn't the girl eat her pizza? She had no face.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Never mind that. I have a gun and your child. Come out with all your valuables and he won't get hurt.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So he wouldn't become rotisserie with a side of hash brown.

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Why did the little boy throw rocks at his sister? ...Because she has cancer.

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Q: What's big, yellow and can't swim? A: A school bus full of children.

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A very rich man had a daughter whom all of the men in town wanted to marry her for wealth. Except there was one man who wanted to marry her due to his love for her. The father let his daughter marry whomever she wanted from all of the men in town, and she chose a man named Wilson Fremblington who wanted to marry her for wealth, because he was physically fit and overall a friendly man.

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Uh... Justin, the most pointless man... I gotta cringe for a moment, I don't want to be mean here, but I think my body cell total opinion pool dropped a large quantity there, its not that I do not want you anymore, but, my body`s mass body cell total is kinda denying me... Actually I am denying IT... ACTUALLY WE ARE DENYING EACH OTHER, (which is totally awesome, united denial fighting against one another FOR DENYING THE MOST! BECAUSE COOPERATION IS FOR PUSSIES!) Anyway, hell I am dead tired, oh yeah, Justin... Man, Uh, who where you again?

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What do you do when you find a black guy bleeding on your porch? You should call an ambulance! This man is hurt!

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what do you make if you get a cow, then kill it. ...Steak

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A man gets a paternity test. It's better than beating his wife senseless due to his own insecurity.

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You know what really chaps my ass? Thongs.

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Q: Why did the Little girl fall off the swing set? A: She was Shot in the face.

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patient: Doctor, doctor, i think i'm a lemon. Doctor: racial segregation and presidency is my middle name.

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What is worse than torturing, "forcibly penetrate" and then slowly and painfully kill nine billion people? The Holocaust?

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How do you make a fat man cry? You call him fat.

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Why didn't Suzie answer her mother? Suzie has a serious condition where she is mute and also severely deaf.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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