What did the dying man say to his friends? Nothing. He had no friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Roses are red, violets are blue When I cut you, you bleed

thumb_up thumb_down -13

your mom is so fat that she had to start going to a gym to exercise and get her weight under control.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do short Mexicans do after a hot shower? Dry off with a towel like everyone else,

thumb_up thumb_down -13

whats black and white and black and white and black and white? a penguin rolling down a hill whats black and white and laughing? the penguin that pushed him

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why don't you hit a black guy riding a bike? Because that is dangerous and he could get hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do Michael Jackson and a T-Rex have in common? They're both dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's worse than finding a worm on your apple? Trench foot on your eyebrow.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what happened to the chicken who crossed the road he didn't realize that the light was green

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Have you seen the newest starwars? What movie? I mean that episode where stars fight... Will Smith vs Keanu Reeves? I am talking about the stars in the sky firing at each other! You know, those star pilots on planes... Flown by Will Smith and Keanu Reeves? BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! (You heard that one in your head)

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he has a great career and a loving family.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Person 1: Why does food from Subway taste so good? Person 2: I don't know, why? Person 1: Because their ingredients are fresh. Person 2: Um, OK? Person 1: Yeah, it's all under 18. Person 2: Shit...

thumb_up thumb_down -13

why did the car go to the bathroom? it had gas.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A deaf man is listening to the radio. Think about it.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Roses are red, and blood is too. But violets are purple. NOT FUCKING BLUE.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What happens when you turn the TV on? You watch it.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q: How many hair styles do celebreties induce annualy? A: I have no clue but I'm pretty sure that's a midget defacing your house!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A man walks into a bar. He tricks a lady into smelling a rag doused with chlorophoam, and rapes her.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A- 2 jews walk in a bar..what happed? B- they died 35 years later from skin cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What does the ship say when it's cold? Shiver me timbers

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Yo mama so fat, she suffered a heart attack last week and we are all deeply concerned.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call your mother's bipolar brother with three arms? Uncle.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Did you know, every time you close your eyes, a ghost appears. Once you open your eyes it disappears. PROVE I'M WRONG!?

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops