A baby walks into a bar and the bartender says.... Where is your mom?

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What do you call a bookstore with explosive offers? Barnes and Cher-Noble.

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Relax, anyway I hope its just the not not hypnotic suggestion, it would be really disappointing to to know that you are high on weed, even if it is very relaxing, not that I would know, I tried valium once, it kinda increased that sensation you have tenfold. Anyway, what I meant to say was, would you kindly tell me what size your breasts are? Do you shave down there?

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Why was the little girl crying in the woods at night? There was psychotic killer chasing her with a chainsaw.

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A white guy and a black guy are sitting in a bar. The white guy apologizes to the black guy for the hundreds of years of slavery endured by his people.

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John lazzaro likes dick

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What's the difference between a book. A tree's leaves hit the trash cans

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The closest I've been to an animal charity was when I walked past it to by myself a fur coat

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A man walks in to a bar and everyone screamed running out the door.

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How many apples do you end up with if your dog is a golden retriever who got raped by a giant scorpion? A jail

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What if algebra teachers were actually pirates, and they're making us find the X so they can search for buried treasure?

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roses are red violets are blue heres the oven now where the **** is the jew

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you can either take the test now or on monday. (hand movement)

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-How much wood would a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood? -Probably a decent amount.

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Why did the black man wash his feet? PHOIT!!!! He washed his feet in a bird bath... Too bad his car got thrown off a cliff by a bald eagle with no feathers?

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What Would George Washington say if he were alive to day. why are all the slaves free?

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What happened to the child drowning in a pool? He was saved by the well-trained lifeguard.

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What do lawyers and sharks have in common? They both play vital roles in their own society or ecosystem.

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why did the man stay home on a monday? He was dead.

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what's worse than a dead baby in the bathtub? if the baby was named Grace.

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How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen Beatle? Two in the front, two in the back, and one hundred in the ash tray.

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How do you make Jacob cry? Take away his xbox

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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roses are red violets are blue i have no money could i have some

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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