Knock knock. Who's there? The bailiffs, we have come to take your house

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why does Chuck Norris always know the time? He bought a fancy new watch.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What are you getting for Christmas? Wasted.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Koolaid is red, Poweraid is blue, Gatorade is yellow, My urine is brown... looks like i have a bladder infection.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Life is confusing. Really how so? He just walked up to me five minutes ago with a pair of socks taped on both sides of his face saying humanity is screwed and ran off after peeing on my carpet.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A black woman was filling out forms at the welfare office. Under "Number of children," she wrote "10," and where it said "List names of children," she wrote "Leroy." When she handed in the form, the woman behind the desk pointed out: "Now here where it says "List names of children," you're supposed to write the names of each one of your children." "Dey all named Leroy," said the black woman. "That's very unusual. When you call them, how do they know which one you want?" asked the welfare worker. The Black woman said, "Oh, den I uses the middle names."

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

thumb_up thumb_down +5

I found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school. I said, "Wow, I can't believe I just found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school." Later that day, my principal gassed the kindergarten classrooms with cyanide while shouting, "GO RAIDERS!"

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do you call a black priest? Holy shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

why did everyone laugh at the kid in the wheel chair as he entered the room? he was poor

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was trying to commit suicide through vehicular manslaughter and knew that the average human being would not be able to stop before it was too late.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What should you do if you have a 10 inch penis? Subtly tell the world via an anti-joke

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why arent guys and girls the same? Cause there different

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What does a black kid get for Christmas? Your bike

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man felt a pain in his stomach. He went to the doctor.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Who created Apple? Steve jobs.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A working black man, Santa, and the Easter Bunny where walking down the street and find a penny, who picks it up? The working black man, Santa and the Easter Bunny take no payment for their work.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

rose's are red violets are blue I have touretts blblblblblblblblbbl

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man walks inta pet store looking for a dog. All he finds are cats.What did he end up buying. A weasel

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What does a weasel and a naked college girl have in common? No clothes

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the chicken cross the road? Listen, it's a free country.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q: What did osama bin laden say to the worker behind the gas station counter? A: May I buy this bag of chips?

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Stacey has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Stacey.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's worse than a crying baby on a trans-Atlantic flight? A hungry lion on a trans-Atlantic flight.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops