Knock Knock. Whose there? The IRS. All your base are belong to us.

What did jimmy say when his brother had been mean to him all day and he was about to get a straw and his brother took the last one? That was the last straw!

How do prevent a nun from walking through a revolving door? Put a spear through her head.

Question: What is worse then a worm in your apple? Answer: A number of different things I would imagine...

How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A wood chuck could chuck as much wood as a wood chuck would if a wood chuck could chuck wood.

Q Why did the chicken cross the road A Nobody knows why because nobody is psych

How do you make a baby understand what you want? You color yourself purple, wear a yellow shirt, and do cart wheels while singing "The wheels on the bus go 'round and 'round!"

Why did the Grizzly bear refrain from attacking the hiker? It didn't. The hiker was torn to shreds within minutes.

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead.

Why did the old man die? He was old.

What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

One sunny Tuesday morning, Tom and his friends were outside playing at the park. Then, suddenly, a violent storm was rapidly approaching. It was recommended that everyone should seek shelter immediately.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was died...

Roses are red Violets are blue Last but not least, Bananas are yellow.

Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says: "Man it's hot in here!" The other muffin looks over and says "Holy cow a talking muffin!"

Two men and a woman go to lunch together at a restaurant in New York City. The first man says, "I'm glad that we're finally doing this." The second man says, "Yeah, me too." The woman concurs.

Why did the chicken cross the road? That is none of your concern as it invades his freedom of privacy.

Roses are red Violets are blue Im really bad at poetry Your mums a whore

how do you confuse a blonde do nothing

What happened to the kids bike? It broke when he got hit by a bus

Why did the Squirrel swim across the river upside down? To keep its nuts dry.

Who jumps the highest in basketball? The mascot because he has a trampoline.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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