Have u seen Ray Charles' piano "no" neither did he

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What did the cat say to the dog before chasing each other You have a nice looking ass

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He was at Victoria's Secret and he wasn't watching where he was going.

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Your cat was in pain after after a stack of books suddenly fell on it. It's pain is extra-strong so you give it ExtraStrength Tylenol. Guess what happens next time? Nothing. It takes only 50mg to 60mg of Tylenol to poison a cat. 1 ExtraStrength Tylenol tablet is about 10 times that amount (500mg). You killed your cat. It's dead now and there is no "next time"..

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A man violently rapes a small child. Unfortunately the child has aids and gives them to the man.

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Did you hear the joke about the deaf mail man? No. Neither did he.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first koala. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game.

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What is green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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Jimmy: Knock Knock Nick: Whose there? Jimmy: Joe Nick: Joe Who? Jimmy: Joe Mamma Nick: No shes dead.

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Three midgets walk into a bar. The first one orders a beer, the second one orders whiskey, and the third one ordered water because all three of them had agreed that he would be the designated driver that night.

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Knock Knock whos there? brad are you thomas brad are you thomas who? for goodness are you a parot or something

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A man walks into a bar, he now has a mild concussion

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Why did the black girls wear fancy clothes to the mall? Public nudity is considered a crime in many parts of the world. It would be advisable to wear clothes in public areas, so as to avoid being arrested.

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so a jewish man walks into a bar. He looks at the bartender and says...this better be free

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Why did the old man cross the road? Coz he was in an ambulance

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So mind telling me why you wont call me? And why, you know... Are you avoiding this condition of yours?

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Did you here about the Asian couple who had a stupid baby? They named him Sum Ting Wong

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roses are red violets are blue flowers come in many colors

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What did the viking say to the alien? "Vad i namn av valhalla är en utlänning gör här?"

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How do you minimize the likelihood of theft? Take the derivative.

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what do you call an octopus with 9 tentacles? a male octopus

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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What's worse than a bee sting? A large number of things ranging from getting stung by two bees to falling off a cliff.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue; In Soviet Russia, POEM WRITES YOU!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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