What did the man say after jumping into a well? He didn't say anything because he died instantly after jumping head first into a dry, 20 foot well. His family mourned for three days.

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Q: How did the man walk across the road? A: With his own 2 feet!

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Truth is Jordan Abu aita has a hairy @ss

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What's the difference between a portuguese widow and a llama? One is a portuguese widow and the other isn't.

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b

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a guy walks into a bar.. ouch

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Why cant Hellen Keller read? Because shes dead!!!

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Roses are red Violets are victorious 2 in a chamber Mr pistorius

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why is the sky blue? because your mother blocked your computer to meatspin.com

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What's white, wet, and loved by women? A polar bear cub.

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My jeans

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What's worst then finding a worm in your apple Eating it.

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A Jew walks into a bar...He uses his coupon to get a free drink, then leaves.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, My vagina is Red, Im on my period.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Once upon a time, there were two brothers jumping on a bed. The one stopped because the other fell off the bead and died.

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Why don't black people ever defend themselves on anti jokes? Because black people are slaves.

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EVERYBODY has a penis!!! Everybody!!!!

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What do you call a bug stepped on 47 times, then burned to a crisp? Dead

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Knock Knock Who's There Nobody Nobody Who?

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Extremely vulnerable to predacious animals such as Brown Bears and Grey Herons

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What do you do when your wife is about have a baby? Throw her off the balcony go into parking lot and reach into her mouth if you feel a leg stab her in the belly button untill her intestines are coming out and burn the body singing Elmo's world

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WITH YOUR RED THUMBS COMBINED! I AM CAPTAIN MORAL! You: GOOOOO (AWAY) MORAL! CAPTAIN MORAL MAN, IS A HERO, GONNA TAKE GREEN THUMBS RIGHT BACK TO ZERO... Moral: Okay that is all I remember about the Captain Planet Theme song... GIVE ME RED THUMBS MUAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA! PS: Redhead, three months have passed (more or less) I wont call you because we agreed you would get of this fucking place, but I can visit you if you are a good little girl! And yeah I am calling you Red, Tifa just reminds me of Final Fantasy and your big bosoms so yeaaaaah get your little red haired cunt over here so we can chat yes?

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What do you get when a man farts then a giraffe digests the gas and then poops into the mouth of a rabid baby raccoon? A raisin coated in corn flakes with digestive fluid sauce.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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